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Before Morning Coffee

Cat food substitute, when available

Before Morning Coffee thanks to Martin Grosse

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Every dog has his day. - Unknown

Curiosity killed the cat. - English Proverb

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

When coffee dreams, it dreams of chocolate. - Unknown

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffet

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

What would life be without coffee? But then, what is it even with coffee? - King Louis XV

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

A dog is the only thing on this earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings

If there's no coffee, I'm not getting up. Make Groundhog Day just better. - ethicalbean

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

I just want a hot cup of coffee, black, and I don't want to hear about your troubles. - Charles Bukowski

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

A half finished shawl left on the coffee table isn't a mess; it's an object of art. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Lord Alfred Tennyson

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

A giraffe's coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of its throat. Ever think about that? No. You only think about yourself. - Unknown

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda


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