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Barking Up The Wrong Tree

This dog has a birch bark

Barking Up The Wrong Tree thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

QuotaBills
Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

How much is that doggie in the window? - Bob Merrill

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffet

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

Once there was a tree, and she loved a little boy. - Shel Silverstein

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Bernard Williams

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

How difficult it is to save the bark of reputation from the rocks of ignorance. - Petrarch

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. - Fred Allen

A dog is the only thing on this earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings

Raising boys is like raising puppies. One must take them for a walk every few hours. - Jody Defries

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Transplanting the ballet to the United States is like trying to raise a palm tree in Dakota. - Lincoln Kirsten

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

It's better to fall from a tree and break your back than to fall in love and break your heart. - African Proverb

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

The birch-bark canoe of the savage seems to me one of the most beautiful and perfect things of the kind constructed by human art. - William C. Bryant

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. - George Carlin

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


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