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Happy Keester

Kids cracking up while enjoying Easter

Happy Keester thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

Happy Keester thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

QuotaBills
Easter is never deserved. - Jan Karon

Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

I go through life like a Karate Kid. - Britney Spears

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Great shot kid, that was one in a million. - Han Solo

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

When I was a kid everyone used to call me pork 'n. - Michael Biehn

Acting is standing up naked and turning around slowly. - Rosalind Russell

Easter is very important to me, it's a second chance. - Reba McEntire

Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime. - Red Skelton

Those have a short Lent who owe money to be paid at Easter. - Benjamin Franklin

What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts. - Homer Simpson

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? - George Carlin

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them. - Rodney Dangerfield

The merry year is born, like the bright berry from the naked thorn. - Hartley Coleridge

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex. - Bill Maher

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

All kids are gifted: some just open their packages earlier than others. - Michael Carr

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. - Mark Twain

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if he wanted to be one? - Jackie Mason

I'm like the kid in kindergarten; I really do send valentines to everyone. - Susie Bright

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed. - Don Rickles

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

It's only when the tide goes out that you learn who's been swimming naked. - Warren Buffet

My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper. - Amy Sedaris

When I was a kid, I used to think pork chops and karate chops were the same thing. - Shane Koyczan

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

When I was a kid, I always wanted to live in California because I liked skateboarding. - Demetri Martin

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

I can get motivated seeing a kid at my son's school overcome a learning disability. - Jason Alexander

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

A rich person should leave his kids enough to do something, but not enough to do nothing. - Warren Buffet

I'm so ugly my father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet. - Rodney Dangerfield

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people and hallelujah is our song. - Pope John Paul II

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

Few Indians only had breech cloths, most being wrapped in buffalo robes, otherwise quite naked. - Zebulon Pike

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it. - George Burns

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. - Steven Wright

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

No kid is unsmart. Every kid's a genius at something. Our job is to find it. And then encourage it. - Robin Sharma

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

I was a huge bookworm as a kid, and you could usually find me reading something with a dragon on its cover. - Julie Kagawa

The legacy I want to leave is a child-care system that says no kid is going to be left alone or left unsafe. - Marian Wright Edelman

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians,
and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people. - Groucho Marx

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller


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