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Cat Got Your Tail?

Holding on to a good-ride diaper

Cat Got Your Tail? thanks to Rita Ewert

Kitten for sail

QuotaBills
International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

When life gives you lemons, order the lobster tail. - Ziad K. Abdelnour

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

I'm Southern, so alligator tail is pretty interesting and yummy. - LeAnn Rimes

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. - Garrison Keillor

Tell her I ain't crawlin' home to her with my tail between her legs. - Archie Bunker

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

A rich person should leave his kids enough to do something, but not enough to do nothing. - Warren Buffet

If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like. - Phyllis Diller

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week. - Will Rogers

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson


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