#1 humor site on the 'net

Alien Smuggling

How's Your Claustrophobia?

Alien Smuggling thanks to Karen Moore

Alien Smuggling thanks to Karen Moore

Alien Smuggling thanks to Karen Moore

QuotaBills
The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

Our constitution protects aliens, drunks and U.S. Senators. - Will Rogers

There is no security in this life. There is only opportunity. - Douglas MacAurthur

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

We spend our time searching for security and hate it when we get it. - John Steinbeck

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

He prefers the security of known misery to the misery of unfamiliar insecurity. - Sheldon B. Kopp

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

It is true greatness to have in one the frailty of a man and the security of a god. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

A man's own good breeding is the best security against other people's ill manners. - Lord Chesterfield

I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability to just walk away. - Jack Nicholson

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death. - James F. Bymes

The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner

If Aliens visit us, the outcome would be much as when Columbus landed in America, which didn't turn out well for the Native Americans. - Stephen Hawking

In a world of complex threats, our security and leadership depends on all elements of our power - including strong and principled diplomacy. - Barack Obama

My folks came to the U.S. as immigrants, aliens, and became citizens. I was born in Boston, a citizen, went to Hollywood and became an alien. - Leonard Nimoy

Social Security's not the hard one to solve. Medicare, that is the gorilla in the room, and you've got to put all of it on the table. - Joe Biden


Squirrel Gymnast

Economic Stimulation

Financial Meltdown

Redneck Tailgate

Marital Rating Chart - Wife

Mona Lisa - Behind The Scenes

Cultivator

Hazardous Materials Data Sheet for Woman

TP Safety

Crochet Shorts

Wine Bottle Recycling

Garden Outhouse

Alberta Winter Fridge

Wheelbarrow Wheelies

Redneck Deer Stand

Bucket Seat

Security Camera Setup

Smithton Stoneys

Hearse Parking

Just Saying Goodbye

Golden End of the Rainbow

Redneck Shower

Thank You For Driving

Debbie's Fridge