#1 humor site on the 'net

That's Not A Bagpipe!

Little Johnny solves the Scottish dilemma

That's Not A Bagpipe! thanks to Ken Milne

QuotaBills
Keep calm and bagpipe on. - Unknown

He has Van Gogh's ear for music. - Billy Wilder

Music describes what words can't. - Unknown

Kind words are the music of the world. - F.W. Faber

Inspiration is remembering the future. - Unknown

Canned music is like audible wallpaper. - Alistair Cooke

Without music, life would be a mistake. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Inspiration and genius - one and the same. - Victor Hugo

Rock and roll: music for the neck downwards. - Keith Richards

The earth has its music for those who will listen. - George Santayana

Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music. - Ronald Reagan

You can't touch music, but music can touch you. - Mordecai

Making music should not be left to the professionals. - Michelle Shocked

Life exists for the love of music or beautiful things. - G K Chesterton

Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end. - Igor Stravinsky

Music is the art which is most nigh to tears and memory. - Oscar Wilde

The music is all around us. All you have to do is listen. - August Rush

You just pick a chord, go twang, and you've got music. - Sid Vicious

When inspiration does not come to me, I go halfway to meet it. - Sigmund Freud

We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out. - Unknown

All music is folk music. I ain't never heard no horse sing a song. - Louis Armstrong

Music is the divine way to tell beautiful, poetic things to the heart. - Pablo Casals

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to. - Elvis Presley

Amateurs wait for inspiration. The rest of us just get up and go to work. - Chuck Close

The trouble with dancing naked is that not everything stops when the music does. - Unknown

I think my music is like anchovies - some people like it, some people get nauseous. - Barry Manilow

My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don't. - Simon Cowell

I think of inspiration as desire infused with spirit and topped with an almost reckless optimism. - Fred White

The most beautiful thing in the world is, precisely, the conjunction of learning and inspiration. - Wanda Landowska

Boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. - Jack Handey

I think Paul McGuinness and U2 created the Irish music industry. It certainly wasn't there before that. - Van Morrison

In a weird kind of way, music has afforded me an idealism and perfectionism that I could never attain as me. - Billy Corgan

What sounds to you like a big load of trashy noise... is in fact... the brilliant music of a genius... myself. - Iggy Pop

Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same thing nowadays. - Oscar Wilde

The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular? - David Sarnoff

The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be. - Horace Bushnell

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of twenty-two, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation. - Tom Stoppard

Music embodies feeling without forcing it to contend and combine with thought, as it is forced in most arts and especially in the art of words. - Franz Liszt

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means put down. - Bob Newhart


Redneck Ladder

Home Depot Delivery

Taco Bell Secret Seasoning

Are You OK?

Downchuck

Rickshaw Workout

Tenacity

Annual Meeting of Women Drivers

Bach Flip

Alien Smuggling

The Three Stooges In And Out Of Character

Teamwork

Sorry

Dunking Straw

Vatican Chess

Boot Camp

Hold On, Let Me Catch The Ball

Big Hands Baby

Fire Truck Sinkhole

Cyclist Mailbox

Tearable Puns

Penmanship

Tree Removal

I Sea Drums