#1 humor site on the 'net

Waiting For Windows To Boot

Looking for a faster computer or a better relationship?

Waiting For Windows To Boot thanks to Gandhi Mukkavilli

QuotaBills
You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music. - Ronald Reagan

Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can. - Arthur Ashe

Where you start is not as important as where you finish. - Zig Ziglar

The computer is down. I hope it's something serious. - Stanton Delaplane

If you really want to know yourself, start by writing a book. - Shereen El Feki

The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows. - Sydney J. Harris

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits. - Unknown

Do not be embarrassed by your failures, learn from them and start again. - Richard Branson

Valentine's day without your love is like a year without the Internet. - Santosh Kalwar

On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the 'escape' key. - Unknown

You don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great. - Zig Ziglar

With a little study you'll go a long ways, and I wish you'd start now. - Groucho Marx

When you start recognising that you're having fun, life can be delightful. - Jane Birkin

When my wife asked me to start a garden the first thing I dug up was an excuse. - Henny Youngman

I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland. - Woody Allen

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success. - Dr. Joyce Brothers

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

No matter what, the very first piece of social media real estate I'd start with is a blog. - Chris Brogan

Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will. - George Lucas

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

Every crucial experience can be regarded as a setback - or the start of a new kind of development. - Mary R Rinehart

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? - Unknown

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

Change can come in either of two important ways: Start behaving positively or stop behaving negatively. - Dr. Phil

I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters. - Frank Lloyd Wright

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. - Joan Rivers

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won't come in. - Alan Alda

If you want to make a permanent change, stop focusing on the size of your problems and start focusing on the size of you. - T. Harv Eker

We do not need to attend classroom training programs for everything. Observation opens the windows of knowledge around us. - Sukant Ratnakar

Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

The day I made that statement, about inventing the internet, I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the camcorder. - Al Gore

The night stared me in the face, amorphous, blind, infinite, without frontiers. Not a single start relieved the darkness behind the glass. - Stanisław Lem

You don't need endless time and perfect conditions. Do it now. Do it today. Do it for twenty minutes and watch your heart start beating. - Barbara Sher

If you don't value your time, neither will others. Stop giving away your time and talents. Value what you know and start charging for it. - Kim Garst


Squirrel Gymnast

Economic Stimulation

Financial Meltdown

Redneck Tailgate

Marital Rating Chart - Wife

Mona Lisa - Behind The Scenes

Cultivator

Hazardous Materials Data Sheet for Woman

TP Safety

Crochet Shorts

Wine Bottle Recycling

Garden Outhouse

Alberta Winter Fridge

Wheelbarrow Wheelies

Redneck Deer Stand

Bucket Seat

Security Camera Setup

Smithton Stoneys

Hearse Parking

Just Saying Goodbye

Golden End of the Rainbow

Redneck Shower

Thank You For Driving

Debbie's Fridge