Hazardous Materials Data Sheet for Woman

Dull women have immaculate homes. - Unknown

Women and elephants never forget. - Dorothy Parker

Women should be obscene and not heard. - Groucho Marx

There are no ugly women, only lazy ones. - Helena Rubinstein

For most of history, Anonymous was a woman. - Virginia Woolf

Women would rather be right than reasonable. - Ogden Nash

Taking joy in life is a woman's best cosmetic. - Rosalind Russell

I've been told I'm a role model to many women. - Donald Trump

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. - George Carlin

I like men who have a future and women who have a past. - Oscar Wilde

A weeping man and a smiling woman are not to be trusted. - Indian Proverb

He has a woman's name and wears makeup. How original. - Alice Cooper

We're women. We have a double standard to live up to. - Ally McBeal

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. - Groucho Marx

Irene Lorenzo, queen of the Women's Lubrication Movement. - Archie Bunker

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

I became a feminist as an alternative to becoming a masochist. - Sally Kempton

A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears. - Woodrow Wyatt

Honesty is probably the sexiest thing a man can give to a woman. - Debra Messing

Behind every successful man is a woman.
Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

That woman is liable to come at you like a Doberman's Pincher. - Archie Bunker

It is much easier to take care of a sackful of fleas than a woman. - German Proverb

The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes. - Oscar Wilde

There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works. - Will Rogers

Men fall in love with their eyes. Women fall in love with their ears. - Dr. Phil McGraw

How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them. - Groucho Marx

I wouldn't be caught dead marrying a woman old enough to be my wife. - Tony Curtis

A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. - Oliver Herford

A woman knows the face of the man she loves as a sailor knows the open sea. - Honore de Balzac

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. - WC Fields

A woman's best love letters are always written to the man she is betraying. - Lawrence Durrell

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

If men knew how women pass the time when they are alone, they'd never marry. - O. Henry

Menopause is our chance to say, "I am woman - open a freaking window." - Unknown

Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it. - Evan Esar

Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible. - Margaret Mead

A woman will flirt with anybody in the world as long as other people are looking on. - Oscar Wilde

In Hollywood, the women are all peaches. It makes one long for an apple occasionally. - W Somerset Maugham

A man who moralizes is usually a hypocrite, and a woman who moralizes is usually plain. - Oscar Wilde

Women have a hard enough time in this world; telling them the truth would be too cruel. - H L Mencken

Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance. - Oscar Wilde

The fantasy of every Australian man is to have two women - one cleaning and the other dusting. - Maurenn Murphy

One of the few articles of clothing that a man won't try to remove from a woman is an apron. - Marilyn Vos Savant

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied. - Oscar Wilde

To my eye, women get sexier around 35. They know a thing or two, and knowledge is always alluring. - Pierce Brosnan

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd,
Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorned. - William Congreve

Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. - Rita Rudner

The clothes in themselves do not make a statement. The woman makes the statement and the dress helps. - Jean Muir

The expression a woman wears on her face is far more important than the clothes she wears on her back. - Dale Carnegie

A woman, especially if she has the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can. - Jane Austen

Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev

A woman's dress should be like a barbed-wire fence: serving its purpose without obstructing the view. - Sophia Loren

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her. - Agatha Christie

No matter how plain a woman may be, if truth and honesty are written across her face, she will be beautiful. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes. - Robert Frost

Remember, we're fighting for this woman’s honor, which is probably far more than she's ever done! - Groucho Marx

She wore far too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always a sign of despair in a woman. - Oscar Wilde

Our duty, as men and women, is to proceed as if limits to our ability did not exist. We are collaborators in creation. - Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

All of the women on 'The Apprentice' flirted with me - consciously or unconsciously. That's to be expected. - Donald Trump

If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him... is he still wrong? - George Carlin

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

Hosting the Oscars is much like making love to a woman. It's something I only get to do when Billy Crystal is out of town. - Steve Martin

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

Every man and woman is born into the world to do something unique and distinctive, and if he or she does not do it, it will never be done. - Benjamin E. Mays

I'm finally starting to scratch the surface of what women want. And I think the answer lies somewhere between conversation and chocolate. - Mel Gibson