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LadyNet

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Oh, so they have internet on computers now! - Homer Simpson

To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady. - Wilson Mizner

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

The computer is down. I hope it's something serious. - Stanton Delaplane

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben

For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk

The internet turns 30 minutes of homework into 2 hours of homework. - Unknown

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream. - Mark Twain

There is not so variable a thing in nature as a lady's head-dress. - Joseph Addison

On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the 'escape' key. - Unknown

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store. - Kin Hubbard

The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't. - Margaret Thatcher

Ladies and gentlemen are permitted to have friends in the kennel but not in the kitchen. - George Bernard Shaw

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid. - Jane Austen

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

I asked the waiter, "Is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass." - Phyllis Diller

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

If all the young ladies who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised. - Dorothy Parker

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Man is the cheapest 150-pound nonlinear, all-purpose computer system which can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. - NASA

Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright

From sixdegrees to Friendster to Facebook, social networking has become a familiar and ubiquitous part of the Internet. - David Kirkpatrick

Until Facebook came along, there was hardly anywhere on the public Internet where you had to operate with your real name. - David Kirkpatrick

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady, and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat. - P.J. O'Rourke

If you are really Master of your Fate,
It shouldn't make any difference to you whether Cleopatra or the Bearded Lady is your mate. - Ogden Nash

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber

I'm readin' in the paper where the CIA is dopin' people up. Maybe somebody injected some of that LSD in the lady's cottage cheese. - Archie Bunker

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright

The problem with the internet is that it gives you everything - reliable material and crazy material. So the problem becomes, how do you discriminate? - Umberto Eco


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