#1 humor site on the 'net

Dragon Boots

These boots are fang-tastic!

Dragon Boots thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Boot-e-full gift for the dragon slayers in your life

QuotaBills
A full mind is an empty baseball bat. - Branch Rickey

Always speak politely to an enraged Dragon. - Steven Brust

But yes. Come, faulty dragon people. Follow us. - Rick Riordan

Problems are only opportunities in work clothes. - Henry J Kaiser

Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes. - Milton Berle

I am a brother to dragons, and a companion to owls. - Bible

The two things children wear out are clothes and parents. - Unknown

For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move. - Phyllis Diller

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings. - JRR Tolkien

When the prison doors are opened, the real dragon will fly out. - Ho Chi Minh

The sage wears rough clothing and holds the jewel in his heart. - Lao-Tzu

I think being a dragon would be pretty awesome... you get to fly. - Josh Keaton

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

There were dragons to slay in the old days. Nixon was a good dragon. - Pat Oliphant

Fang drops so much food on his ties we keep them in the refrigerator. - Phyllis Diller

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on her with a pitchfork. - Jonathan Swift

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

It is ever so much easier to be good if your clothes are fashionable. - L.M. Montgomery

The most important thing about batting is getting the bat to hit the ball. - Michael Holding

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

I'm kind of honored to be a dragon lady. The dragon is a very powerful, mythical animal. - Yoko Ono

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say 'when'. - P G Wodehouse

I always wanted to ride a dragon myself, so I decided to do this for a year in my imagination. - Cornelia Funke

I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? - Phyllis Diller

One of the few articles of clothing that a man won't try to remove from a woman is an apron. - Marilyn Vos Savant

We are our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves. - Tom Robbins

Fang and I are always fighting. When we get up in the morning, we don't kiss; we touch gloves. - Phyllis Diller

I was a huge bookworm as a kid, and you could usually find me reading something with a dragon on its cover. - Julie Kagawa

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

Have you ever taken anything out of the clothes basket because it had become, relatively, the cleaner thing? - Katherine Whitehorn

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

You can't just carry everyone else's hopes and fears around in your backpack and expect to stand up straight. - David Kirk

Fairy tales are more than true: not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten. - Neil Gaiman

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

The first thing that stuck in the minds of the disciples was not the empty tomb, but rather the empty grave clothes - undisturbed in form and position. - Josh McDowell

It is possible that mankind is on the threshold of a golden age; but, if so, it will be necessary first to slay the dragon that guards the door, and this dragon is religion. - Bertrand Russell

Mathematical rigor is like clothing: in its style it ought to suit the occasion, and it diminishes comfort and restrains freedom of movement if it is neither too loose or too tight. - G.F. Simmons

There was a young belle of old Natchez
Whose garments were always in patchez;
When comment arose on the state of her clothes,
She drawled, "When Ah itchez, Ah scratchez!" - Ogden Nash

Puff, the Magic Dragon, lived by the sea, and frolicked in the Autumn Mist in a land called Honah Lee, little Jacky Paper loved that rascal Puff, and gave him strings and sealing wax and other fancy stuff. - Peter Yarrow


Protractor Cook

Street Genius

Rebar Walker

No Worries

Road To Success

Politician Training

Math in Africa

Customers Wanted

Sock Storage

Hung Out To Dry

Need More Horsepower?

Japanese Diving Platform

Water Taxi

Wrench Family

How To Burn Fat

Ghetto Boat

Car Surgeon

Just Blew It

His Dent

Cheat of the Year

Divorce Defined

Paint Ladder

Peopledarin

Frozen Pipes in the Garage