#1 humor site on the 'net

Swimming Without Getting Your Hair Wet

Enjoying the pool while letting your hair down

Swimming Without Getting Your Hair Wet thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Out of water, I am nothing. - Duke Kahanamoku

Only dead fish swim with the stream. - Unknown

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Friendship is a plant we must often water. - German Proverb

Bread and water can so easily be toast and tea. - Janet Clarkson

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

You can't cross the sea merely by staring at the water. - Rabindranath Tagore

There's one good thing about being bald: it's neat. - Milton Berle

If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. - Loren Eiseley

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool. - L.M. Boyd

No man drowns if he perseveres in praying to God, and can swim. - Russian Proverb

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

Live in the sunshine
Swim in the sea
Drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

If his IQ slips any lower, we'll have to water him twice a day. - Molly Ivins

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly. - Morticia Addams

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

One of my goals in life is to have the biggest residential pool on the planet. - Drake

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. - Thomas Jefferson

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim. - Frida Kahlo

What is harder than rock, or softer than water? Yet soft water hollows out hard rock. Persevere. - Ovid

The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley

Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker

Whatever I am offered in devotion with a pure heart - a leaf, a flower, fruit, or water - I accept with joy. - Bhagavad Gita

Many people cycle or swim to keep trim. But if swimming is so good for the figure, how do you explain whales? - Charles Saatchi

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

Happiness consists in activity: such is the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and not a stagnant pool. - John M. Good

After all, when a stone is dropped into a pond, the water continues quivering even after the stone has sunk to the bottom. - Arthur Golden

Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion. - Unknown

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need. - Tom Robbins

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci


Tonsil Ring

Portrait Gallery

Piano Dog

The Art Of Politics

Martini Shirt

American Mustache

Wedding Room Dress

Redneck TP

Big Bird Feeder

City Work Crew's Slow Day

Cow Trampoline

Suspicious Blood Donor

Friends In High Places

Hair Cut Toupee

Finger Physio

Texas Steak

Triathlete with a Drinking Problem

Awning Truck Advertising

Racial Profiling Starts Early

Your Move

Florida Bird Flu

Croc Surfing

Zip Tie Prank

Ukrainian Power Adaptor