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Chewing Gum Hazard

Government Health Warning - beware of 'Hemorrhoid Helper' workouts

Chewing Gum Hazard thanks to Wally Zatylny

Hemorrhoid Helper Class - Rectum? Darned near killed 'em!

QuotaBills
Of all the 36 alternatives, running away is best. - Chinese Proverb

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. - Joseph Addison

Restore a man to his health, his purse lies open to thee. - Robert Burton

I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting. - Mark Twain

Maybe I oughta get one of them priests in to exercise with her. - Archie Bunker

Flattery is like chewing gum. Enjoy it but don't swallow it. - Hank Ketcham

Where there is laughter there is always more health than sickness. - Phyllis Bottome

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Motivation is the fuel, necessary to keep the human engine running. - Zig Ziglar

Every time I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes. - Robert Hutchins

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets. - John D. Rockefeller

The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running. - Unknown

Nobody likes insurance companies, especially health insurance companies. - P.J. O'Rourke

Jogging is for people who aren't intelligent enough to watch television. - Victoria Wood

Fitness needs to be perceived as fun and games or we subconsciously avoid it. - Alan Thicke

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

It was amazing I won. I was running against peace and prosperity and incumbency. - George W. Bush

Health care's not about insurance! Health care's about getting treatment. - P.J. O'Rourke

I recently became a Christian Scientist. It was the only health plan I could afford. - Betsy Salkind

People don't trust private health insurance companies for all the right reasons. - Bernie Sanders

The reason I'm running for President is because I can't be Bruce Springsteen. - Barack Obama

You can outdistance that which is running after you, but not what is running inside you. - Rwandan Proverb

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

Cheerfulness is the best promoter of health and is as friendly to the mind as to the body. - Joseph Addison

I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves. - Prince Philip

Mental health problems do not affect three or four out of every five persons but one out of one. - William Menninger

Old minds are like old horses; you must exercise them if you wish to keep them in working order. - John Adams

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

What can be added to the happiness of man who is in health, out of debt, and has a clear conscience? - Adam Smith

There is no impossibility to him who stands prepared to conquer every hazard. The fearful are the failing. - Sarah J. Hale

When governments become large, voters cannot exercise close oversight, otherwise known as political power. - Maggie Gallagher

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not. - George Bernard Shaw

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

Tarry a moment to watch the chaos of a playground, crayola-colored shirts of running children, all trying out their wings. - Dr. SunWolf

Running! If there's any activity happier, more exhilarating, more nourishing to the imagination, I can't imagine what it might be. - Joyce Carol Oates

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker


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