#1 humor site on the 'net

Chinese Shoelusion

Geisha Girl toe-wards the end of the 20th Century

Chinese Shoelusion thanks to Robyn Friesen

and I thought my shoes hurt...

Chinese Shoelusion thanks to Robyn Friesen

Chinese Shoelusion thanks to Robyn Friesen

Chinese Shoelusion thanks to Robyn Friesen

Chinese Shoelusion thanks to Robyn Friesen

Chinese Shoelusion thanks to Robyn Friesen

Chinese Shoelusion thanks to Robyn Friesen

QuotaBills
A closed mouth gathers no feet. - Unknown

Nurses are angels in comfortable shoes. - Unknown

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. - George Carlin

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads. - Henry David Thoreau

In life as in dance: Grace glides on blistered feet. - Alice Abrams

I have little feet because nothing grows in the shade. - Dolly Parton

Once on his feet, though, man does not stay where he is. - Frederic Gros

The littlest feet make the biggest footprints in our hearts. - Unknown

The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents. - John J. Plomp

I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet. - Mohandas K. Gandhi

It's headed for the brambles and we are all in our bare feet. - WC Fields

It's better to die upon your feet than to live upon your knees. - Emiliano Zapata

Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush. - Doug Larson

Forget aging. If you're six feet above ground, it's a good day. - Faith Hill

I always thought a yard was three feet, then I started mowing the lawn. - C.E. Cowman

The best use of laws is to teach men to trample bad laws under their feet. - Wendell Phillips

I liked being a teenager, but I would not go back for all the tea in China. - Rob Lowe

There's man all over for you, blaming on his boots the fault of his feet. - Samuel Beckett

My feet will want to walk to where you are sleeping, but I shall go on living. - Pablo Neruda

I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night. - WC Fields

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance. The wise grows it under his feet. - James Oppenheim

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. - Mark Twain

If you play a tune and a person don't tap their feet, don't play the tune. - Count Basie

You can't sweep other people off their feet if you can't be swept off your own. - Clarence Day

I have spread my dreams beneath your feet. Tread softly because you tread on my dreams. - William Butler Yeats

A man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world. - George Santayana

In the hopes of reaching the moon men fail to see the flowers that blossom at their feet. - Albert Schweitzer

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

Like a bull into a china closet. Like in that picture, "The Prince and The Porpoise." - Archie Bunker

Don't criticize what you don't understand, son. You never walked in that man's shoes. - Elvis Presley

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. - Khalil Gibran

You know you're old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you're barefoot. - Phyllis Diller

How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings, that publisheth peace. - Isaiah 52:7

Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? He's a mile away and you've got his shoes. - Billy Connolly

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Life is a child playing around your feet, a tool you hold firmly in your grip, a bench you sit down upon in the evening, in your garden. - Jean Anouilh

I'll love you, dear, I'll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street. - W H Auden

This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet. - Rumi


Business School Basics

Hadoukens

Delicious Grief

Sister DNA

Muscle Control

Squirrel Feeder Trap

Ironic Gifts

Better Lawyer

Free Gas

Multi-Pilot Jet

Face Heater

Palestinian Security Check

Segway in Rural Norway

Quad Shot

2019 Hooters Owl & Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Basketball Car

No Muff Too Tough

Broken Potted Plant Art

Six Hunnit

Snow Detour

Selfie Stuck

Organic Compromise

Wurst-Case Scenario

Fish Hat