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Computerholic

Root-bound computer programming - online branch office

Computerholic thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Root-ing around for the best humour at joe-ks.com

QuotaBills
Ancestry is a hereditary condition. - Unknown

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

The righteous will flourish like the palm tree. - Psalms 92:12

Computer logic is no substitute for human wisdom. - Unknown

Once there was a tree, and she loved a little boy. - Shel Silverstein

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

Genealogy: Tracing yourself back to people better than you are. - John G. Pollard

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

Southerners are so devoted to genealogy that we see a family tree under every bush. - Florence King

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

The root of all superstition is that men observe when a thing hits, but not when it misses. - Francis Bacon

Character is better than ancestry, and personal conduct is of more importance than the highest. - Thomas J. Barnardo

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches, letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights. - Pauline R. Kezer

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Our ideas, like orange-plants, spread out in proportion to the size of the box which imprisons the roots. - Edward Bulwer Lytton

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

It's in the democratic citizen's nature to be like a leaf that doesn't believe in the tree it's part of. - David Foster Wallace

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

You know, sometimes I feel well and vital in the world, and sometimes I just feel so distressed I want to pull my hair out by the roots. - Sharon Stone

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

The greatest thing about man is his ability to transcend himself, his ancestry and his environment and to become what he dreams of being. - Tully C. Knoles

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. - George Carlin

I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree;
Perhaps, unless the billboards fall,
I'll never see a tree at all. - Ogden Nash


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