#1 humor site on the 'net

Heart's Heart

Let me call you sweet heart, I'm in love with you...

Heart's Heart thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

What's eating away at your heart?

QuotaBills
A light heart lives long. - William Shakespeare

Love is metaphysical gravity. - R Buckminster Fuller

All's fair in love and war. - John Lyly

The hottest love has the coldest end. - Socrates

Love in its essence is spiritual fire. - Emanuel Swedenborg

Wear your heart on your skin in this life. - Sylvia Plath

In tennis, a love match is always possible. - Unknown

I know of only one duty, and that is to love. - Albert Camus

The best love affairs are those we never had. - Norman Lindsay

Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo. - Groucho Marx

Love sought is good, but given unsought is better. - William Shakespeare

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. - Joan Rivers

The only way to do great work is to love what you do. - Steve Jobs

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

All my life, my heart has yearned for a thing I cannot name. - Andre Breton

Don't marry a tennis player - love means nothing to them. - Joan Rivers

Love your neighbor as yourself, but choose your neighborhood. - Louise Beal

The seat of knowledge is in the head, of wisdom, in the heart. - William Hazlitt

What a lover's heart knows let no man's brain dispute. - Aberjhani

First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity. - George Bernard Shaw

Love is like the wind, you can't see it but you can feel it. - Nicholas Sparks

A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination. - Nelson Mandela

Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. - Bill Cosby

The head thinks, the hands labor, but it's the heart that laughs. - Liz Curtis Higgs

Love is what happens to men and women who don’t know each other. - W Somerset Maugham

Love unlocks doors and opens windows that weren't even there before. - Mignon McLaughlin

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day. - Jay Leno

Love wouldn't be blind if the braille weren't so damned much fun. - Armistead Maupin

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life. - Confucius

Don't be so much in love that you can't tell when it's raining. - African Proverb

Men have died from time to time, and worms have eaten them - but not for love. - William Shakespeare

They say love's like the measles - all the worse when it comes late in life. - Douglas William Jerrold

I knew right away that Rock Hudson was gay when he did not fall in love with me. - Gina Lollobrigida

Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. - Jesus

Being in love with yourself means never having to say you've got a headache. - Ellie Laine

The day the power of love overrules the love of power, the world will know peace. - Mahatma Gandhi

Do not hire a man who does your work for money, but him who does it for love of it. - Henry David Thoreau

When you pray, rather let your heart be without words than your words without heart. - John Bunyan

On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse. - Milton Berle

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her. - Oscar Wilde

Love is a promise, love is a souvenir, once given never forgotten, never let it disappear. - John Lennon

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn? - Bob Hope

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind. - William Shakespeare

There never was any heart truly great and generous, that was not also tender and compassionate. - Robert Frost

Love is not only the story of butterflies or birds; it is also the story of jackals and hounds. - M.F. Moonzajer

There comes a time in every life when the world gets quiet and the only thing left is your heart. - Sarah Dessen

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

The time I burned my guitar it was like a sacrifice. You sacrifice the things you love. I love my guitar. - Jimi Hendrix

Without love, what are we worth? Eighty-nine cents! Eighty-nine cents worth of chemicals walking around lonely. - Hawkeye

People judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold, but so has a hard-boiled egg. - Unknown

Canada has given us John Candy and Martin Short and Bill Shatner and Lord knows how many other wonderful performers. - Jamie Farr

But here's what I've learned in this war, in this country, in this city: to love the miracle of having been born. - Oriana Fallaci

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. - Albert Schweitzer

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. - Elizabeth Stone

I can't promise that I'll be here for the rest of your life, but I can promise that I'll love you for the rest of mine. - Unknown

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

Life can be magnificent and overwhelming - that is the whole tragedy. Without beauty, love, or danger it would almost be easy to live. - Albert Camus

Too many young folk have an addiction to superficial things and not enough conviction for substantial things like justice, truth and love. - Cornel West

Love as powerful as your mother's for you leaves its own mark ... to have been loved so deeply ... will give us some protection forever. - J K Rowling

I'll love you, dear, I'll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street. - W H Auden

One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst

The modern era has brought up immense conveniences but at what price. The human heart is desperate for something more than a quicker serving of popcorn. - John Eldredge

Flo was fond of Ebenezer
"Eb," for short, she called her beau.
Talk of tides of love, great Caesar!
You should see them - Eb and Flo. - Thomas Daly

Idealistic reformers are dangerous because their idealism has no roots in love, but is simply a hysterical and unbalanced rage for order amidst their own chaos. - William I. Thompson

My wife sent me a Valentine card that said, "Take my heart, take my lips, take my soul." That's just like her. She kept the good parts for herself. - Milton Berle

Live your truth. Express your love. Share your enthusiasm. Take action towards your dreams. Walk your talk. Dance and sing to your music. Embrace your blessings. Make today worth remembering. - Steve Maraboli

Are you bored with life? Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart, live for it, die for it, and you will find happiness that you had thought could never be yours. - Dale Carnegie

I like mathematics because it is not human and has nothing particular to do with this planet or with the whole accidental universe - because, like Spinoza's God, it won't love us in return. - Bertrand Russell


iPhone Charger

Tube Travel

Redneck Tree Fort

OCD Guy

World's Tallest Bus

Long Liquor Store

Happy Wood Pig

On Top Of Things

Anail Retention

Bat Flight

The No Brainer

Truck Bender

Bacon Balls

Fast Closure

Ukrainian Feast

1934 Modern Home

Fliptus

Copper Tubing Specialist

Bach Off Van

Boss Resume

Canadian Gun Shop

Hogwart's Other Bridge

Excalibutter

As The World Turns