#1 humor site on the 'net

Road Pirate

VW's new nautical steering wheel

Road Pirate thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Known as a 'road-hog' in the Netherlands

The vodka is absolut-ly empty, the escape hatch is ajar, and the helmsman is no longer lashed to the wheel...

QuotaBills
Aren't most of you descended from pirates? - Prince Philip

The best road to progress is freedom's road. - John F Kennedy

No one is in your mind - you are its only driver. - Unknown

Every generation welcomes the pirates from the last. - Lawrence Lessig

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens. - JRR Tolkien

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

My driving abilities from Mexico have helped me get through Hollywood. - Salma Hayek

I've never had a clear road map. When things come along, I benefit. - Greg Kinnear

The road to freedom must be uphill, even if it is arduous and frustrating. - Andrew Goodman

Never break your putter and your driver in the same round or you're dead. - Tommy Bolt

The Bible does not give us a road map for life, but it does give us a compass. - Gordon S. Jackson

An opening statement is like a guide or a road map. It's a very delicate thing. - Johnnie Cochran

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

We're all pilgrims on the same journey, but some pilgrims have better road maps. - Nelson DeMille

All you need is the plan, the road map, and the courage to press on to your destination. - Earl Nightingale

Beneath this slab
John Brown is stowed;
He watched the ads
And not the road. - Ogden Nash

The middle of the road is where the white line is - and that's the worst place to drive. - Robert Frost

They say you only go around once, but with a muscle car you can go around two or three times. - Tim Allen

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

I don't really know much about pirates, or pirate culture. I'd be a contrarian pirate. - Todd Barry

Most of American life is driving somewhere and then driving back wondering why the hell you went. - John Updike

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth - not going all the way, and not starting. - Buddha

Our battered suitcases were piled on the sidewalk again; we had longer ways to go. But no matter, the road is life. - Jack Kerouac

Happiness is to be found along the way, not at the end of the road, for then the journey is over and it is too late. - Robert R. Updegraff

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

If you see ten troubles coming down the road, you can be sure that nine will run into the ditch before they reach you. - Calvin Coolidge

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

Our minds are as different as our faces: we are all traveling to one destination; happiness; but few are going by the same road. - Charles Caleb Colton

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

The road to success is not easy to navigate, but with hard work, drive and passion, it's possible to achieve the American dream. - Tommy Hilfiger

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt


Double Line Parking

Without Government

Nose For Coke

Crisp Chips

3 Stages Of A Man's Life

Tipsy Crane

Clear View

Redneck Ladder

Home Depot Delivery

Taco Bell Secret Seasoning

Are You OK?

Downchuck

Rickshaw Workout

Tenacity

Annual Meeting of Women Drivers

Bach Flip

Alien Smuggling

The Three Stooges In And Out Of Character

Teamwork

Sorry

Dunking Straw

Vatican Chess

Boot Camp

Hold On, Let Me Catch The Ball