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Twin Dish

New satellite TV system for pets

Twin Dish thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

Happiness was born a twin. - Lord Byron

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

Dogs got personality. Personality goes a long way. - Quentin Tarantino

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

Very few people know this man was born an only twin. - Henny Youngman

Sex on television can't hurt you - unless you fall off. - Unknown

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

Canadian cities looked the way American cities did on television. - William Gibson

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

Getting an award from TV is like being kissed by someone with bad breath. - Mason Williams

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

Satellite imagery is the only way we can map the looting patterns effectively. - Sarah Parcak

There are two things in this life for which we are never fully prepared: twins. - Josh Billingsad

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

A memorandum isn't written to inform the receiver, but to protect the writer. - Dean Acheson

Do you realize if it weren't for Edison we'd be watching TV by candlelight? - Al Boliska

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

President Ford tells us all to bite the bullet and Betsy Ford goes on TV and shoots off her mouth. - Archie Bunker

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

One of television's great contributions is that it brought murder back into the home, where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of the television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. - Johnny Carson

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


Just Blew It

His Dent

Cheat of the Year

Divorce Defined

Paint Ladder

Peopledarin

Frozen Pipes in the Garage

Attentive Student

Corgi Snow Height

FishSun - Touching The Sun

SailBite Ride - Swimming Not Advised

Bach To Front

Slamming On Your Brakes

Trampoline Apartment

Radar Replacement

UFO Caught On Tape

Bacon Wrapped Onion Rings

Camouflage Garage

Aisle Cleanup

Spanish Restrooms

Camel Parking

Rust-ic Truck

World's First Laser Pointer

Skeleton Hairstyle