#1 humor site on the 'net

Two Face

Putting your best face forward - but which one?

Two Face thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Bald is beautiful from both sides

Do your friends call you two-faced?
QuotaBills
Often a noble face hides filthy ways. - Euripides

Never ask the barber if you need a haircut. - Warren Buffet

Even the worst haircut eventually grows out. - Lisa Kogan

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

A hair on the head is worth two on the brush. - Oliver Herford

He doesn't dye his hair, he bleaches his face. - Johnny Carson

Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you. - Maori Proverb

He had a dashing smile. It nearly dashed right off his face. - Shannon Hale

Face reality as it is, not as it was or as you wish it to be. - Jack Welch

Even if you fall on your face, you're still moving forward. - Robert C. Gallagher

Age imprints more wrinkles in the mind than it does on the face. - Montaigne

The problem is not to find the answer; it's to face the answer. - Terence McKenna

I remember your name perfectly; but I just can't think of your face. - William A Spooner

A woman knows the face of the man she loves as a sailor knows the open sea. - Honore de Balzac

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

The whiter my hair becomes, the more ready people are to believe what I say. - Bertrand Russell

Let a smile be your umbrella, and you'll end up with a face full of rain. - George Carlin

Any idiot can face a crisis - it's the day-to-day living that wears you out. - Anton Chekhov

Was this the face that launched a thousand ships, and burnt the towers of Ilium? - Christopher Marlowe

Find what you are afraid of, face it, and then you won't be afraid of it anymore. - Marilyn Manson

A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. - Steve Martin

I'm not Irish. Just because I have red hair doesn't mean I'm a lucky charm. - Rebecca Mader

I'm just glad it'll be Clark Gable who's falling on his face and not Gary Cooper. - Gary Cooper

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

If you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely. - Roald Dahl

Life is to be lived, not controlled; and humanity is won by continuing to play in face of certain defeat. - Ralph Ellison

Don't laugh at a youth for his affectations; he is only trying on one face after another to find his own. - Logan P. Smith

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

To be loved at first sight, a man should have at the same time something to respect and something to pity in his face. - Stendhal

I was the equivalent of a 98 pound weakling. I would go to the beach and people would throw copies of Byron in my face! - Robin Williams

Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower. - Elayne Boosler

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face. - Rodney Dangerfield

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

You know, sometimes I feel well and vital in the world, and sometimes I just feel so distressed I want to pull my hair out by the roots. - Sharon Stone

F-E-A-R has two meanings:
'Forget Everything And Run' or
'Face Everything And Rise.'
The choice is yours. - Zig Ziglar

The night stared me in the face, amorphous, blind, infinite, without frontiers. Not a single start relieved the darkness behind the glass. - Stanisław Lem

You're not supposed to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong, no matter who does it or who says it. - Malcolm X

A man finds room in the few square inches of the face for the traits of all his ancestors; for the expression of all his history, and his wants. - Ralph Waldo Emerson


The Importance of Tax Return Accuracy

Speed Limit Fraction

Camouflage Dalmation

Jigsaw Sudoku Puzzles D

Just For The Halibut

Sore Escape

Cobra Games

Malaysian Airlines Ad

180 Degrees From Ordinary

Ben Dover Plumbing

Tree Hugger Car

Cyclist Port-A-Potty

Redneck Fish Finder

Conversations Down The Path Of Life

Redneck Anniversary Gift

Overflow Truck Garden

New IRS Form

Flower Farm

Blind (Braille) Sudoku Puzzles B

Search and Rescue - Dry Run

Gene Wilder

Where Not To Fall A Tree

The Eye Of A Needle

Wagon Races