#1 humor site on the 'net

Used Cows For Sale

What would you do with a used cow?

Used Cows For Sale thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Cattle marketing for the poor and not-so-famous

QuotaBills
These are cathedrals of shopping. - Emile Zola

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers

I've got the hottest brand in the world. - Donald Trump

Inequality of knowledge is the key to a sale. - Neil O Gustafson

Social media are tools. Real time is a mindset. - David M. Scott

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Marketing strategy is a lot like military strategy. - Liddell Hart

I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. - Tammy Faye Bakker

I intend to build this brand again... Elite is legendary. - Donald Trump

For corporate marketers, podcasting is low-hanging fruit. - Paul Gillin

Change is like a charging cow. Don't ignore it - milk it. - Andrew Leigh

Advertising is the greatest art form of the twentieth century. - Marshall McLuhan

Traditional methods of sales prospecting are grossly inefficient. - Jill Konrath

A good thing sells itself; a bad thing advertises itself for sale. - African Saying

All the good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow. - Grant Wood

Marketing is far too important to leave to the marketing department. - David Packard

Advertising has annihilated the power of the most powerful adjectives. - Paul Valery

You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. - Tom Robbins

There is no such thing as a bad client, but there such a thing as bad advertising. - Jerry D Femina

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman

It used to be that people needed products to survive. Now products need people to survive. - Nicholas Johnson

The next time you hear a social media myth, question it. Ask for the proof, and ask out loud. - Dan Zarrella

Companies need to lighten up and take themselves less seriously. They need to get a sense of humor. - Unknown

Advertising promotes the divine discontent which makes people strive to improve their economic status. - Ralph Butler

Everything is for sale in Hollywood; the fairy tale, the costume, the pumpkin, the footman and the mice. - Amanda Eliasch

The aim of marketing is to know and understand the customer so well the product or service fits him and sells itself. - Peter F Drucker

People shop and learn in a whole new way compared to just a few years ago, so marketers need to adapt or risk extinction. - Brian Halligan

Audiences everywhere are tough. They don't have time to be bored or brow beaten by orthodox, old fashioned advertising. - Craig Davis

Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok

For almost seventy years the life insurance industry has been a smug sacred cow feeding the public a steady line of sacred bull. - Ralph Nader

Instead of one-way interruption, Web marketing is about delivering useful content at just the precise moment that a buyer needs it. - David M. Scott

Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless. - Sinclair Lewis

Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes. - Tommy Douglas

Search, a marketing method that didn't exist a decade ago, provides the most efficient and inexpensive way for businesses to find leads. - John Battelle

Advertising moves the goods - if it's good advertising. Bad advertising doesn't move the goods because it doesn't move the buyers. - Unknown

Social media is about friending someone so they'll invite you to a party or get you a job. If that's the work, Snapchat is the playground. - Evan Spiegel

If you have more money than brains, you should focus on outbound marketing. If you have more brains than money, you should focus on inbound marketing. - Guy Kawasaki


Turbo Charged Computer

Redneck Neighborhood Watch

Time To Hang Up The Thong

Our Grate Lord

Vertical Roller Coaster Ride

Girl's Party

Sleep Driving

Portuguese Airport Runway

Nintendo Wedding Cake

Going Nowhere Mall

Skateboard Suit

Texas Truck

Tailgate Coyote

Montreal Canadian Fan

Canadian Man Cave

Puffin Walk

Wine Gum Lamp

Stepladder Bike

Prison Escapee's Not-Quite-Clean Escape

Heh - That's My Ball!

Revenue Canada's Simplified Tax Form

Canadian Restroom Rules

Clever Man

Circular Residences - Roundabout Directions