#1 humor site on the 'net

Air Meal

Latest airline cutback - the helium diet

Air Meal thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Dust thou art, to dust returnest. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Tea is a religion of the art of life. - Okakura Kakuzo

To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals. - Benjamin Franklin

One does not marry art. One ravishes it. - Edgar Degas

An art thief is a man who takes pictures. - George Carlin

Life is the art of drawing without an eraser. - John Gardner

You can't hatch chickens from fried eggs. - German Proverb

The art of being wise is knowing what to overlook. - William James

Politics is the art of controlling your environment. - Hunter S. Thompson

The art of a people is a true mirror to their minds. - Jawaharlal Nehru

Interpretation is the revenge of the intellect upon art. - Susan Sontag

Music is the art which is most nigh to tears and memory. - Oscar Wilde

As the velocity of air increases, its pressure decreases. - Daniel Bernoulli

One should either be a work of art, or wear a work of art. - Oscar Wilde

I'm Jewish, so I don't know much about Easter eggs. - Simon Kinberg

I miss Irish milk. Probably not as much as Superquinn sausages. - Tristan MacManus

As a kid, I got three meals a day. Oatmeal, miss-a-meal and no meal. - Mr. T

Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time. - Thomas Merton

Our Air Corps reunion was held to rememmorate the great things we done. - Archie Bunker

The less a person accomplishes in a day, the more he talks during meals. - Unknown

Anyone who says you can't see a thought simply doesn't know art. - Wynetka Ann Reynolds

All art is autobiographical. The pearl is the oyster's autobiography. - Frederico Fellini

There are moments when Art almost attains to the dignity of manual labor. - Oscar Wilde

The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it's dead for you. - Oscar Wilde

You use a glass mirror to see your face; you use works of art to see your soul. - George Bernard Shaw

It is only an auctioneer who can equally and impartially admire all schools of art. - Oscar Wilde

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep. - Scott Adams

Art is so wonderfully irrational, exuberantly pointless, but necessary all the same. - Gunter Grass

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. - Chinese Proverb

Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better. - Andre Gide

A half finished shawl left on the coffee table isn't a mess; it's an object of art. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

The art of art, the glory of expression, and the sunshine of the light of letters, is simplicity. - Walt Whitman

The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. - Albert Einstein

Ethics is in origin the art of recommending to others the sacrifices required for cooperation with oneself. - Bertrand Russell

Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer


Cake Finders

Shot Glasses

Frog Spout Security

Chopper Bicycle

Canadian Suntan

Walkway To Heaven

Groucho Marx and Jimmy Savile

Despicable Shoes

Prayer Conditioning

Lazy People Make Excellent Engineers

Spaghetti Western

Under The Weather

Backpack Barney

My Sweet Potato

Who Needs a Guard Dog?

My Next Life

Mouse Insider

Close Ups

Redneck Camera Phone

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Redneck Cupboard

Homeless Signs

Floor Store

Mary Go Round