#1 humor site on the 'net

Bucket Bath

Kids prefer bottom down management

Bucket Bath thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Little Johnny's toilet training is going 'well'

Alabama guest rooms have room for outdoor baths
QuotaBills
The Child is father of the Man. - William Wordsworth

A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

All children are essentially criminal. - Denis Diderot

The soul is healed by being with children. - Fyodor Dostoyevski

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose. - Steven Wright

The two things children wear out are clothes and parents. - Unknown

There are two kinds of cruises - pleasure and with children. - George Burns

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

When I was a child, nobody died; but now it happens all the time. - Unknown

Children find everything in nothing; men find nothing in everything. - Giacomo Leopardi

Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, farm boy. - Han Solo

Too many of today's children have straight teeth and crooked morals. - Unknown

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula. - Dave Barry

A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn't act that way very often. - Unknown

Times are bad. Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book. - Cicero

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

Do we not all agree to call rapid thought and noble impulse by the name of inspiration? - George Eliot

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home. - Phyllis Diller

If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like. - Phyllis Diller

I had a very happy childhood, which is unsuitable if you're going to be an Irish writer. - Maeve Binchy

The most beautiful thing in the world is, precisely, the conjunction of learning and inspiration. - Wanda Landowska

Success is the good fortune that comes from aspiration, desperation, perspiration and inspiration. - Evan Esar

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

Fathers are like a lighthouse - when there is fog his children can always depend on seeing the light. - Unknown

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

Children aren’t happy without something to ignore,
And that’s what parents were created for. - Ogden Nash

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, "Lillian, you should have remained a virgin." - Lillian Carter

Enthusiasm is the inspiration of everything great. Without it no man is to be feared, and with it none despised. - Christian Nevell Bovee

No man should bring children into the world who is unwilling to persevere to the end in their nature and education. - Plato

There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender. - WC Fields

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity there ain't nothing can beat teamwork. - Mark Twain

Tarry a moment to watch the chaos of a playground, crayola-colored shirts of running children, all trying out their wings. - Dr. SunWolf

If I had one wish for my children, it would be that each of them would reach for goals that have meaning for them as individuals. - Lillian Carter

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller


Chewie, We're Home

Police Rides

Bird Smoker

Hot Mexican Deals

Coffin Escape

African Airlines

Who Let The Dogs Out?

Autographed Copy

Fresh Air Computing

Porpoise Pilots

Sorry Employees

Sidecar

Middle East Play House

Cadillac Clearance

Don't Believe Everything You Read

Bee Prepared

Stolen Car

Paper Face

End Of The Line

Glass World - Where Plumbers Buy

Sheep in Wool Clothing

Admin Assistant Bird

Game's On

Backtracker Special