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Designer Dog

My best friend has a chalk board

Designer Dog thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

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Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

What is this, an audience or an oil painting? - Milton Berle

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

When I was a kid I inhaled frequently. That was the point. - Barack Obama

What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts. - Homer Simpson

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

All kids are gifted: some just open their packages earlier than others. - Michael Carr

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. - Brian P. Cleary

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

I've gone from being bullied by jocks as a kid to being bullied by nerds as an adult. - Chris Hardwick

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

No kid is unsmart. Every kid's a genius at something. Our job is to find it. And then encourage it. - Robin Sharma

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

Self-consciousness is the enemy of all art, be it acting, writing, painting, or living itself, which is the greatest art of all. - Ray Bradbury

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Painting is a blind man's profession. He paints not what he sees, but what he feels, what he tells himself about what he has seen. - Pablo Picasso

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz


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