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Candy Hairess

Where there's always enough candy

Candy Hairess thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

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I only eat candy on Halloween. - Michael Trevino

I feel old when I see mousse in my opponent's hair. - Andre Aggassi

You can't compete with a six foot five man in a wig. - Shemar Moore

Every day People straighten up the hair, why not the heart? - Ernesto Guevara

Let the wind blow through your hair while you still have some. - Dave Weinbaum

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum. - P G Wodehouse

As a child, the only clear thought I had was "Get candy." - Jerry Seinfeld

I really mustache you a question... but I'll shave it for later. - Unknown

I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair. - Tom Sharp

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? - Lily Tomlin

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

I don't want a wig that looks like a wig; I want one that could pass for a weave. - Nicki Minaj

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. - Steve Martin

I'm not Irish. Just because I have red hair doesn't mean I'm a lucky charm. - Rebecca Mader

When I was with Andy Warhol, I thought, 'God, his wig looks cheaper than mine!' - Dolly Parton

If you wear a wig, everybody notices. But if you then dye the wig, people notice the dye. - Andy Warhol

I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson

I unfortunately still crave chicken McNuggets and bacon, which is the meat candy of the world. - Katy Perry

Whether you're a man or not comes from your heart, not how much hair you have on your head. - Bruce Willis

I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere

Do I have a large frog in my hair? I'm worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten. - Joaquin Phoenix

I like to put on a wig or a fake mustache and do something silly with friends, do a little dance. - Tom Lenk

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

I benefit from the Mr. Potato Head syndrome. Put a wig and a nose and glasses on me, and I disappear. - Phil Hartman

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? - Frank Colby

Canada has given us John Candy and Martin Short and Bill Shatner and Lord knows how many other wonderful performers. - Jamie Farr

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

Are you going to answer my questions, or do I have to whack you with a stick until delicious candy surprises fall out? - Molly Harper

You really just want to know that somebody loves you for you. Sometimes you feel like an ATM machine with a wig on it. - Mariah Carey

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing

I wore a thong and a bra and a wig. Those things hurt. I mean, thongs? Like, they dig in. It takes a tough man to be a woman. - Hank Azaria

All Halloween candy pales next to candy corn, if only because candy corn used to appear, like the Great Pumpkin, solely on Halloween. - Rosecrans Baldwin

You know, sometimes I feel well and vital in the world, and sometimes I just feel so distressed I want to pull my hair out by the roots. - Sharon Stone

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor

His mind is concrete and fastidious,
His nose is remarkably big;
His visage is more or less hideous,
His beard it resembles a wig. - Edward Lear

This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him. - Conan O'Brien

When I was six, I entered a talent contest. I dyed my hair blond, had a chainsaw and pretended I was Eminem. The old folk weren't expecting that. - Nico Mirallegro


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