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Devoted Husband

Looking forward to breakfast in bed?

Devoted Husband thanks to Glenna Kennedy

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I was so cold I almost got married. - Shelley Winters

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

In married life, three is company and two none. - Oscar Wilde

Her husband was infidelicate with another woman. - Archie Bunker

Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper. - Sir Francis Bacon

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. - Joan Rivers

There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose. - Oscar Wilde

Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. - Unknown

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Do you Edith....take Archie Bunker to be your lawfully bedded husband? - Archie Bunker

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. - Red Skelton

I was going to marry a gardener, but he was too rough around the hedges. - Unknown

Marriage is too interesting an experiment to be tried only once or twice. - Eva Gabor

The Pirate is surrealism and so, in a curious way, is Father of the Bride. - Vincente Minnelli

Sometimes I've believed as many as six possible things before breakfast. - Lewis Caroll

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

Marriages are all happy. It's having breakfast together that causes all the trouble. - Irish Proverb

First of all you’ve got to have talent. And then you've got to marry her like I did. - George Burns

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

Rituals are important. Nowadays it's hip not to be married. I'm not interested in being hip. - John Lennon

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her. - Agatha Christie

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married. - Robert Frost

Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can even call yourself a beginner. - Jerry Seinfeld

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates

I don't sit around thinking that I'd like to have another husband; only another man would make me think that way. - Lauren Bacall

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming: 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it; 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. - Patrick Murra

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

A husband is a guy who tells you when you’ve got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick. - Ogden Nash

Getting married is easy. Staying married is more difficult. Staying happily married for a lifetime should rank among the fine arts. - Roberta Flack

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller


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