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Dog Days of Summer

Cooling off on a bed of ice

Dog Days of Summer thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Every dog has his day. - Unknown

Volcanoes erupting hot guava - Archie Bunker

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Are my hot flashes causing Global Warming? - Unknown

I'm still hot - it just comes in flashes. - Unknown

He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

What happens in the hot tub stays in the hot tub. - Aussie Swimmer

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad. - WC Fields

Oh, that sound? I'm in the hot tub, reading a novel. - Jane Smiley

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Canada has never been a melting pot; more like a tossed salad. - Arnold Edinborough

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking. - William B. Sprague

No good work is ever done while the heart is hot and anxious and fretted. - Olive Schreiner

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

Hot lead can be almost as effective coming from a linotype as from a firearm. - John O'Hara

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

I can see you in the kitchen bending over a hot stove, and I can't see the stove. - Groucho Marx

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

Real love is a humble receptivity of a silent heart that is prepared to melt and merge. - Banani Ray

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

There must be quite a few things a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. - Sylvia Plath

Keep your eye out for hot topics and trends. The media is constantly looking for timely stories. - Jim Kukral

For short term relaxation, I take a hot tub. It's my best way to unblock writer's block. - Ellen Hopkins

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

A smile is the lightning system of the face, the cooling system of the head, and the heating system of the heart. - Unknown

Always serve too much hot fudge sauce on hot fudge sundaes. It makes people overjoyed, and puts them in your debt. - Judith Olney

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Unknown

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


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