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Don't dig your grave with a knife and fork. - English Proverb

BANG - A four-letter Italian word for good-bye. - Archie Bunker

I usually take a two-hour nap from one to four. - Yogi Berra

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach. - WC Fields

Liam's like a man with a fork in a world of soup. - Noel Gallagher

Five out of four people have a problem with fractions. - Unknown

If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks. - Brendan Behan

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky? - Stanislaw J. Lec

The Republicans aren't the only ones who want four more years. - Unknown

It was so windy that one of our chickens laid the same egg four times. - Unknown

Four hostile newspapers are more to be feared than a thousand bayonets. - Napoleon Bonaparte

They call it golf because all of the other four-letter names were taken. - Ray Floyd

I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it. - Groucho Marx

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six. - Yogi Berra

In America the President reigns for four years and journalism governs forever and ever. - Oscar Wilde

Lack of direction, not lack of time, is the problem. We all have twenty-four hour days. - Zig Ziglar

Four be the things I'd have been better without: love, curiosity, freckles and doubt. - Dorothy Parker

Morcelli has four fastest 1,500-meter times ever. And all those times are at 1,500 meters. - David Coleman

I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. - Steven Wright

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles

Four things come not back: the spoken word, the sped arrow, time past, the neglected opportunity. - Omar Ibnal-Halif

I went to a 7-11 and asked for a 2x4 and a box of 3x5's. The clerk said, "ten-four." - Steven Wright

Every leap year I like to jump. It’s a good way to get my daily exercise in every four years. - Jarod Kintz

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn't get any worse. - Quentin Crisp

Most of us spend too much time on the last twenty-four hours and too little on the last six thousand years. - Will Durant

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

The best thing I've ever done? Well, I've created four beautiful children. You mean, other than that? - Donald Trump

The prime purpose of being four is to enjoy being four - of secondary importance is to prepare for being five. - Jim Trelease

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself. - Louis Nizer

Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes. - Bob Thaves

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

Strength is the capacity to break a Hershey bar into four pieces with your bare hands - and then eat just one of the pieces. - Judith Viorst

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours. - Lady Hasluck

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

Take two turkeys, one goose, four cabbages, but no duck, and mix them together. After one taste, you'll duck soup for the rest of your life. - Groucho Marx

Five frogs are sitting on a log. Four decide to jump off. How many are left?
Five, because there's a difference between deciding and doing. - Mark L. Feldman & Michael F. Spratt


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