#1 humor site on the 'net

Sam 'n Ella's Chicken Burgers

Restaurant misnomer of the year

Sam 'n Ella's Chicken Burgers thanks to Mike Teehee

Center for spread of salmonella

QuotaBills
Sacred cows make the best hamburger. - Mark Twain

Friccastewing a chicken on the hotplate - Archie Bunker

Rock and roll is the hamburger that ate the world. - Peter York

I wouldn't eat a hamburger for 40,000 dollars. - River Phoenix

A hamburger by any other name costs twice as much. - Evan Esar

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

We take the hamburger business more seriously than anyone else. - Ray Kroc

You cannot come to a Nigerian restaurant without having pepper soup. - Ben Okri

If you want chicken soup, you've got to put a chicken in the pot. - Joe Segal

Give me Caviar Kaspia and give me a hamburger. I love the two extremes. - Michael Kors

So I will say it with relish. Give me a hamburger but hold the lawsuit. - S.I. Hayakawa

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

Yesterday I told a chicken to cross the road. It said, "what for?" - Steven Wright

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

You turn hotdogs with tongs. Don't you ever use those tongs on a hamburger. - J.B. Smoove

I love my squirrel and dumplings, but you can make it with chicken and dumplings. - Kay Robertson

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

Man who invented the hamburger was smart; man who invented the cheeseburger was a genius. - Matthew McConaughey

Of course I have played outdoor games. I once played dominoes in an open air cafe in Paris. - Oscar Wilde

I unfortunately still crave chicken McNuggets and bacon, which is the meat candy of the world. - Katy Perry

The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it. - Ellen Glasgow

Everyone has a right to a university degree in America, even if it's in Hamburger Technology. - Clive James

My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx

The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland

I'm going to the Colonel next. I'm gonna get a big bucket of chicken chests and smashed potatoes. - Archie Bunker

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

I have done a Hamburger Helper commercial, a Hardees commercial, a McDonalds commercial. American Express commercial. - Luke Benward

I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu." The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?" - Steven Wright

There are a zillion variables to a hamburger. What part of the animal went into it. What coarseness. What temperature. - Danny Meyer

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

Why something in the public interest such as television news can be fought over, like a chain of hamburger stands, eludes me. - Jimmy Breslin

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell

Eating a tuna roll at a sushi restaurant should be considered no more environmentally benign than driving a Hummer or harpooning a manatee. - Daniel Pauly

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

If it's flipping hamburgers at McDonald's, be the best hamburger flipper in the world. Whatever it is you do you have to master your craft. - Snoop Dogg


Tree Removal

I Sea Drums

Statue of Libertea

Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner Burrito

Cow Photobomb

Commas Save Lives

Never Give Up

Girl Sitting or Boy Hugging?

The Domino's Effect

Outdoor Pool

Wedding Pound Cake

Fear Of Light

Maiden Rock Illusion

Why Men Shouldn't Babysit

Noodle Art

Windows Scoreboard

Mummy Dogs

Swimming Without Getting Your Hair Wet

Media Bondage

Redneck ATV

Duct Tape - for a Prettier World

Don't Get Your Head In A Knot

Cornfield Fishing

Dawn Gone