#1 humor site on the 'net

Attentive Student

How to relax during a boring lecture

Attentive Student thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
A morning without coffee is like sleep. - Unknown

Work is the curse of the drinking class. - Oscar Wilde

When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. - Buddha

Without enough sleep, we all become tall two-year-olds. - JoJo Jenson

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education. - Mark Twain

Better sleep with a sober cannibal than a drunken Christian. - Herman Melville

A college education shows a man how little other people know. - T.C. Hailburton

Sleep... the most beautiful experience in life - except drink. - WC Fields

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Snore and you sleep alone. - Anthony Burgess

I was a great student at a great school, Wharton School of Finance. - Donald Trump

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact. - Bertrand Russell

As a well spent day brings happy sleep, so life well used brings happy death. - Leonardo da Vinci

I want people to think through issues. I'm just tired of blind alignment. - Joel Salatin

The number one job facing the middle class... a three-letter word, jobs, J-O-B-S. - Joe Biden

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. - Woody Allen

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

I can get motivated seeing a kid at my son's school overcome a learning disability. - Jason Alexander

Each night, when I go to sleep, I die. And the next morning, when I wake up, I am reborn. - Mahatma Gandhi

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

I was the class clown so I was used to performing and fooling around in front of my friends. - Dominic Monaghan

Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did. - Newt Gingrich

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

Character is that which reveals moral purposes, exposing the class of things man chooses or avoids. - Aristotle

I want to die like my father; peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and terrified, like his passengers. - Bob Monkhouse

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence. - Steven Wright

Aarfy was a dedicated fraternity man who loved cheerleading and class reunions and did not have brains enough to be afraid... - Joseph Heller

Sometimes I feel like a groundhog. I wish that every time I saw my workplace I could just go down the hole and go off to sleep. - Sherry Bane

Our loyalties must transcend our race, our tribe, our class, and our nation; and this means we must develop a world perspective. - Martin Luther King Jr.

For disappearing acts, it's hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work. - Doug Larson

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw

When I finished school, I took one of those career-aptitude tests, and based on my verbal ability score, they suggested I become a mime. - Tim Cavanagh

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need. - Tom Robbins

While there is a lower class, I am in it; while there is a criminal element, I am of it; and while there is a soul in prison, I am not free. - Eugene V Debs

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren


Found The Jackpot

2fer Sudoku Puzzles C

DiscourageMeant

Bear's Submarine Patrol

Cat Got Your Tail?

Slingshot Shoes

Redneck Seafood Dinner

Emergency Bridge Repair Team

Balanced Meal

Canadian Car Crash

Florida Car Alarm

Dog Lookout

India Road Assistance

ZipHer

Samurai Sudoku Puzzles C

Lucky Calf

Moose Camouflage

Nail Polish Lookalilikes

Douglas Fir Log Home

Nutcracker Suite - Chinese Version

Clever Weather Billboard

Street Cheerleader

I'm So Old

Ear Chip