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Cornfield Fishing

What they use as bait is a trade secret

Cornfield Fishing thanks to Mel Hardman

Harvesting Corn on the Cob in Iowa

Arkansas Fishing

A good old Arkansas boy won a bass boat in a raffle drawing. He brought it home and his wife looks at him and says, “What you gonna do with that? There ain’t no water deep enough to float a boat within 100 miles of here.”

He says, “I won it and I’m a gonna keep it.”

His brother came over to visit several days later. He sees the wife and asks where his brother is.

She says, “He’s out there in his bass boat,” pointing to the field behind the house.

The brother heads out behind the house and sees his brother sitting in a bass boat with a fishing rod in his hand down in the middle of a big field. He yells out to him, “What are you doing?”

His brother replies, “I’m fishin. What does it look like I’m a doing.”

His brother yells, “It’s people like you that give people from Arkansas a bad name, makin everybody think we’re stupid. If I could swim, I’d come out there and whip your ass!”

QuotaBills
There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb

Fish and visitors stink after three days. - Benjamin Franklin

Praise the ripe field, not the green corn. - Unknown

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. - Irina Dunn

Sex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn. - Garrison Keillor

Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover

This is a truly international field - no Britons involved. - David Coleman

No farmer ever plowed a field by turning it over in his mind. - George E. Woodbury

A sushi chef has to spot the best-quality fresh fish instantly. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Corn can't expect justice from a court composed of chickens. - African Proverb

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

In the field of observation, chance favors only the prepared mind. - Louis Pasteur

Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. Its their way of falling. - Andre Gide

What you need is somebody new - there's more than 1 fish in the woodpile. - Archie Bunker

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. - Steven Wright

Governing a large country is like frying a small fish. You spoil it with too much poking. - Lao-Tzu

An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field. - Niels Bohr

If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens? - Seymour Cray

Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1. - C-3PO

Of all the useless things a person can do, limerick writing is right up there with golf and fishing. - Garrison Keillor

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

Grilling outside with my parents at the Jersey shore. We would grill lobster and corn in the summer. - Bobby Flay

Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

Perseverance alone does not assure success. No amount of stalking will lead to game in a field that has none. - I Ching

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score. - Bill Copeland

A little House well fill'd, a little Field well till'd, and a little Wife well will'd, are great Riches. - Benjamin Franklin

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

Baseball is the only field of endeavor where a man can succeed three times out of ten and be considered a good performer. - Ted Williams

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

All Halloween candy pales next to candy corn, if only because candy corn used to appear, like the Great Pumpkin, solely on Halloween. - Rosecrans Baldwin

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

The quality of a person's life is directly proportional to his commitment to excellence, regardless of his chosen field of endeavor. - Vince Lombardi

Why should we honour those that die upon the field of battle? A man may show as reckless a courage in entering into the abyss of himself. - William Butler Yeats

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell


Super Size Mosquito

Perfectly In Tune With Nature

Crayola Keyboard

Turtle Leash

Beach Trick - Head's Up

Turbo Charged Computer

Redneck Neighborhood Watch

Time To Hang Up The Thong

Our Grate Lord

Vertical Roller Coaster Ride

Girl's Party

Sleep Driving

Portuguese Airport Runway

Nintendo Wedding Cake

Going Nowhere Mall

Skateboard Suit

Texas Truck

Tailgate Coyote

Montreal Canadian Fan

Canadian Man Cave

Puffin Walk

Wine Gum Lamp

Stepladder Bike

Prison Escapee's Not-Quite-Clean Escape