#1 humor site on the 'net

'Do Not Read' Sign

Where even the sign is private

'Do Not Read' Sign thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Fine words do not produce food. - Nigeria Proverb

Things do not change; we change. - Henry David Thoreau

Do not employ handsome servants. - Chinese Proverb

Private jets cost a lot of money. - Donald Trump

An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

Power tires only those who do not have it. - Giulio Andreotti

What you cannot enforce
Do not command. - Sophocles

I do not believe in God and I am not an atheist. - Albert Camus

Every man's memory is his private literature. - Aldous Huxley

You always admire what you really do not understand. - Blaise Pascal

Do not wait for the last judgment. It comes every day. - Albert Camus

I do not regard a broker as a member of the human race. - Honore de Balzac

I do not like work, even when somebody else is doing it. - Mark Twain

You do not get what you want. You get what you negotiate. - Harvey Mackay

It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances. - Oscar Wilde

What is faith unless it is to believe what you do not see? - St. Augustine

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote. - George Jean Nathan

Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing. - Salvador Dali

Do not say a little in many words but a great deal in a few. - Pythagorus

Menopause in progress: go around and do not make eye contact. - Unknown

I think we are blind. Blind people who can see, but do not see. - Jose Saramago

Ideologies do not map the complete living processes of a World. - William Irwin Thompson

If you do not hope, you will not find what is beyond your hopes. - St. Clement of Alexandra

Be wiser than other people, if you can, but do not tell them so. - Lord Chesterfield

I do not want horses or diamonds - I am happy in possessing you. - Clara Schumann

Do not be afraid; our fate Cannot be taken from us; it is a gift. - Dante Alighieri

I do not approve of anything that tampers with natural ignorance. - Oscar Wilde

If you can't sleep do not count the sheep, worship the Shepherd. - Unknown

Those who hammer their guns into plows will plow for those who do not. - Thomas Jefferson

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

Do not be embarrassed by your failures, learn from them and start again. - Richard Branson

We have art so that we do not die of reality. Reality is too much with us. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught. - Winston Churchill

Characters do not change. Opinions alter, but characters are only developed. - Benjamin Disraeli

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it. - Thomas Jefferson

If we do not plant knowledge when young, it will give us no shade when we are old. - Lord Chesterfield

I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. - Jane Wagner

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself. - Mihkail Baryshnikov

The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit. - Nelson Henderson

You can't hit a target you cannot see, and you cannot see a target you do not have. - Zig Ziglar

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign? - Albert Einstein

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

The Irish do not want anyone to wish them well; they want everyone to wish their enemies ill. - Harold Nicolson

Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again. - Nelson Mandela

The true triumph of reason is that it enables us to get along with those who do not possess it. - Voltaire

Mental health problems do not affect three or four out of every five persons but one out of one. - William Menninger

I am not bothered by the fact that I am not understood. I am bothered when I do not know others. - Confucius

There are many things we do not want in this world. Let us not just mourn them; let us change them. - Ferdinand Marcos

The heights charm us, but the steps do not; with the mountain in our view we love to walk the plains. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Since the mathematicians have invaded the theory of relativity, I do not understand it myself any more. - Albert Einstein

Violence of language leads to violence of action. Angry men seldom fight if their tongues do not lead the fray. - Charles V Roman

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. - Matthew 6:34

The natural idealism of youth is an idealism, alas, for which we do not always provide as many outlets as we should. - Sargent Shriver

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain

It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen. - George MacDonald

Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most people are frightened of responsibility. - Sigmund Freud

No sign of pleasure greeted the announcement. The mood in the hall was leaden.
My mood was livelier. Fright is livelier than lead. - Gail Carson Levine

If I advocate cautious optimism it is not because I do not have faith in the future but because I do not want to encourage blind faith. - Aung San Suu Kyi

I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed. - James Thurber

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

When you are called to a sick man, be sure you know what the matter is — if you do not know, nature can do a great deal better than you can guess. - Nicholas de Belleville


Sad TP

Concrete Guestrooms

Spiderman Face Cup

Tick, Tick Good Buddy

Waterfront Icons

Redneck Backhoe Operator

Shanty Town, New Zealand - Potty Pic

Modern Love Affair

Sleepmobile

Osoyoos Sasquatch

Wal-Mart Job Application

Wired Cars

Limit Of Two

Facebook Red Light

Suspended Bedroom

Boss Bird

Static Cat

Matching Receipt

Graffiti Removing Graffiti

How To Make Holy Water

Anti-Theft Car Device

2019 Hooters Owl & Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Can You See It?

Bird Chocolate