You know you're a Floridian if...
Socks are only for bowling.
You never use an umbrella because the rain will be over in five minutes.
A good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store,
but everything to do with shade.
Your winter coat is made of denim.
You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites.
Many of your friends are over 65.
Anything under 70 degrees is chilly.
You've driven through Yeehaw Junction.
You know that no other grocery store can compare to Publix.
You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn't worth waking up for.
You dread love bug season.
You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren't
Hurricane Charley or Hurricane Frances. You know them as Andrew, Charley, Frances, Ivan, Jeanne & Wilma... Irene... Cheryl... Rita... Mary... Allison
You know what a snowbird is and when they'll leave.
You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average.
'Down South' means Key West.
Flip-flops are everyday wear. Shoes are for business meetings and
church, but you HAVE worn flip flops to Church before.
You have a drawer full of bathing suits, and one sweatshirt.
You get annoyed at the tourists who feed seagulls.
A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level.
You know the four seasons really are: Hurricane season, love bug
season, tourist season and summer.
You've hosted a hurricane party.
You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee, Withlacoochee,
Thonotosassa and Micanopy.
You understand why it's better to have a friend with a boat, than
have a boat yourself.
You were 25 when you first met someone who couldn't swim.
You've worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas and New Years Day.
You recognize Miami-Dade as 'Northern Cuba.'
The journey not the arrival matters. - T S Eliot
My first occupation was to map the country. - John Hanning Speke
Somewhere there is a map of how it can be done. - Ben Stein
Many will travel and knowledge will be increased. - Francis Bacon
The Bunkers is going down to Florida as pre-deranged. - Archie Bunker
I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering. - Steven Wright
Travel and change of place impart new vigor to the mind. - Seneca
A journey is best measured in friends, rather than miles. - Tim Cahill
Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. - Steven Wright
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness. - Mark Twain
I think crime pays. The hours are good, and you travel a lot. - Woody Allen
I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi
If a man's wit be wandering, let him study the mathematics. - Francis Bacon
I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin
The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page. - St. Augustine
I've never had a clear road map. When things come along, I benefit. - Greg Kinnear
In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley
I have an existential map; it has "you are here" written all over it. - Steven Wright
A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. - Mark Twain
A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. - John Steinbeck
If you look like your passport photo, then in all probability you need the journey. - Earl Wilson
There are two kind of air travel in the United States, first class and third world. - Bobby Slayton
Our deeds still travel with us from afar, and what we have been makes us what we are. - George Eliot
All you need is the plan, the road map, and the courage to press on to your destination. - Earl Nightingale
Your goals are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life. - Les Brown
Hope is like the sun, which, as we journey toward it, casts the shadow of our burden behind us. - Samuel Smiles
I think every entrepreneur in Canada owes the next generation a road map of how to do it again. - Kevin O'Leary
He who would arrive at the appointed end must follow a single road and not wander through many ways. - Seneca
I travel without barely any luggage. Just a second set of underwear and binoculars and a map and a toothbrush. - Werner Herzog
No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow. - Lin Yutang
For my part, I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel's sake. The great affair is to move. - Robert Louis Stevenson
I think it's my adventure, my trip, my journey, and I guess my attitude is, let the chips fall where they may. - Leonard Nimoy
Happiness is to be found along the way, not at the end of the road, for then the journey is over and it is too late. - Robert R. Updegraff
Our brain is mapping the world. Often that map is distorted, but it's a map with constant immediate sensory input. - E.O. Wilson
To read a writer is for me not merely to get an idea of what he says, but to go off with him and travel in his company. - Andre Gide
Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO
It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. - Woody Allen
The whole object of travel is not to set foot on foreign land; it is at last to set foot on one's own country as a foreign land. - G K Chesterton
Halloween is one of my favorite days of the year. I have a strict rule: I don't work on Halloween and I won't travel on Halloween. - Simon Sinek
I soon realized that no journey carries one far unless, as it extends into the world around us, it goes an equal distance into the world within. - Lillian Smith