#1 humor site on the 'net

Holiday Hours

Giving employees lots of time 'on' during the holidays

Holiday Hours thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Marry in haste, repent at leisure. - English Proverb

I take my vacation on the combine and tractor. - Jon Tester

In our leisure we reveal what kind of people we are. - Ovid

He who does not travel does not know the value of men. - Moorish Proverb

The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure. - Laurence J. Peter

The secret of success is to make your vocation your vacation. - Mark Twain

I think crime pays. The hours are good, and you travel a lot. - Woody Allen

Remember that happiness is a way of travel, not a destination. - Roy L. Goodman

Unemployment insurance is a pre-paid vacation for freeloaders. - Ronald Reagan

If one cannot catch the bird of paradise, better take a wet hen. - Nikita Krushchev

Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are. - Chinese Proverb

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

If there is a paradise on earth, it is this, it is this, it is this. - Babur

To travel is to discover that everyone is wrong about other countries. - Aldous Huxley

The real problem of leisure time is how to keep others from using yours. - Arthur Lacey

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. - Mark Twain

Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer. - William S. Burroughs

There are two kind of air travel in the United States, first class and third world. - Bobby Slayton

Our deeds still travel with us from afar, and what we have been makes us what we are. - George Eliot

No president who performs his duties faithfully and conscientiously can have any leisure. - James K Polk

Why endeavor to straighten the road of life? The faster we travel, the less there is to see. - Helen Hayes

Valentine's Day - a nice holiday because it's the first day of the rest of your wife. - Milton Berle

For short term relaxation, I take a hot tub. It's my best way to unblock writer's block. - Ellen Hopkins

People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home. - Dagobert D. Runes

Seems like Americans just want it to be Halloween all year. The holiday just keeps getting more popular. - Amity Shlaes

I've enjoyed many camping holidays with my sister and her children, but we're pretty posh campers. - Erin O'Connor

He that does good for good's sake seeks neither paradise nor reward, but he is sure of both in the end. - William Penn

I travel without barely any luggage. Just a second set of underwear and binoculars and a map and a toothbrush. - Werner Herzog

No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow. - Lin Yutang

Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living. - Miriam Beard

Airport screeners are now scanning holiday fruitcakes. Not even the scanners can tell what those little red things are. - David Letterman

Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO

Own only what you can always carry with you: know languages, know countries, know people. Let your memory be your travel bag. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown

The whole object of travel is not to set foot on foreign land; it is at last to set foot on one's own country as a foreign land. - G K Chesterton

As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah

People are often quite surprised by the sport and leisure activities practised by the blind. For example, tandem cycling is very popular. - Andrea Bocelli

Politicians also have no leisure, because they are always aiming at something beyond political life itself, power and glory, or happiness. - Aristotle

Integrity will take a leader farther than any other quality. If you would travel far and do much as a leader, never compromise your integrity. - John C Maxwell


Shot Glasses

Frog Spout Security

Chopper Bicycle

Canadian Suntan

Walkway To Heaven

Groucho Marx and Jimmy Savile

Despicable Shoes

Prayer Conditioning

Lazy People Make Excellent Engineers

Spaghetti Western

Under The Weather

Backpack Barney

My Sweet Potato

Who Needs a Guard Dog?

My Next Life

Mouse Insider

Close Ups

Redneck Camera Phone

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Redneck Cupboard

Homeless Signs

Floor Store

Mary Go Round

City Beach Castle