Redneck Skurfing

I surf to get tan. - Shane Dorian

Surfing is for life. - Bruce Jenkins

Out of water, I am nothing. - Duke Kahanamoku

Surfing is attitude dancing. - Gerry Lopez

I've committed to surfing the rest of my life. - Lance Armstrong

You can't cross the sea merely by staring at the water. - Rabindranath Tagore

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it. - Steven Wright

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

If there was no such thing as barrels I probably wouldn't even surf. - Clay Marzo

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

When ya go out there in the water and ya start crossing your longirudes and lassitudes. - Archie Bunker

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

I'm just a surfer who wanted to build something that would allow me to surf longer. - Jack O'Neill

Surfing is the most blissful experience you can have on this planet, a taste of heaven. - John McCarthy

We should be as water, which is lower than all things yet stronger even than the rocks. - Sioux Proverb

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. - Chinese Proverb

It's a culmination of your life of surfing when you turn and paddle in at Mavericks. - Jeff Clark

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

Whatever I am offered in devotion with a pure heart - a leaf, a flower, fruit, or water - I accept with joy. - Bhagavad Gita

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

Sometimes in the morning, when it's a good surf, I go out there, and I don't feel like it's a bad world. - Kary Mullis

I love Canada. It makes a nice hat for America. When America runs out of water, it's the first place I'll go. - Ryan Reynolds

After all, when a stone is dropped into a pond, the water continues quivering even after the stone has sunk to the bottom. - Arthur Golden

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion. - Unknown

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

From a drop of water a logician could infer the possibility of an Atlantic or a Niagara without having seen or heard of one or the other. - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci

A leader is not an administrator who loves to run others, but someone who carries water for his people, so that they can get on with their jobs. - Robert Townsend

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown