#1 humor site on the 'net

Train Hits Deer

I think the Deere is dead...

Train Hits Deer thanks to Glenna Kennedy

Train Hits Deer thanks to Glenna Kennedy

Train Hits Deer thanks to Glenna Kennedy

Train Hits Deer thanks to Glenna Kennedy

Train Hits Deer thanks to Glenna Kennedy

Train Hits Deer thanks to Glenna Kennedy

QuotaBills
A wounded deer leaps the highest. - Emily Dickinson

Defendit numerus: There is safety in numbers. - Unknown

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

I take my vacation on the combine and tractor. - Jon Tester

Maybe I should just go home and ride my tractor. - Chuck Grassley

My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors. - Unknown

Sometimes that light at the end of the tunnel is a train. - Charles Barkley

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

I used to look like a deer in headlights on the red carpet. - Emily Blunt

I drove a tractor almost as soon as I could reach the pedals. - Sheri L. Dew

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, farm boy. - Han Solo

I aimed at the public's heart and by accident I hit it in the stomach. - Upton Sinclair

The only way of catching a train I ever discovered is to miss the train before. - G K Chesterton

There is a light at the end of the tunnel... hopefully its not a freight train! - Mariah Carey

Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion. - Mark Twain

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer. - Philip II

To be born free is an accident; to live free a responsibility; to die free is an obligation. - Mrs. Hubbard Davis

If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen

One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow

I think the shocking thing to discover is the owls are not stupid and very feral, very hard to train. - Robbie Coltrane

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis

Faith is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see -
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

I'm working on a second cookbook and am working on my love story, 'Black Heels to Tractor Wheels.' - Ree Drummond

I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. - Ronald Reagan

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

If a train is coming at you, closing your eyes won't save you... but if you look right at it, you at least have a chance to jump. - Andrew Vachss

Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia. - Judith Viorst

When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer. - Corrie Ten Boom

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin

Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin


Everything Is OK

Knot Art

Zipper Scar Tattoo

Swiss Army Mega Tools

Law of Emotion

Eiffel Tower Modifications

Joyous Lawyers

Acupuncture Face

Star Wars Episode VIII

LiverPool

Digger Dog

You Guys Make Me Sick

Chu Your Food Well

Men's Wedding Photos

Wrench Dinosaur

Suddenly An Oven

Redneck Shower Head

Twin Dish

I Finally Know Why

Finally Got The Sink Fixed

Barred

Surprise Party At The Zoo

Dog Cross

Restored Beauty