#1 humor site on the 'net

Word Puzzle Clock

Apple introduces Wall Clock app ahead of time

Word Puzzle Clock thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Old age comes at a bad time. - Sue Banducci

Insects all business all the time. - David Foster Wallace

What I value most next to eternity is time. - Madame Swetchine

Reputation is for time; character is for eternity. - J.B. Gough

Enjoy life. There's plenty of time to be dead. - Hans Christian Andersen

I'll tell you how the sun rose - a ribbon at a time. - Emily Dickinson

Each time you love, love as deeply as if it were forever. - Audre Lorde

The world's a puzzle; no need to make sense out of it. - Socrates

When was the last time you did something for the first time? - Unknown

Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns. - Groucho Marx

Success consists of getting up just one more time than you fall. - Unknown

The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough. - Rabindranath Tagore

I enjoy my fun time and everything like that but I love what I do. - Christina Milian

It takes no more time to see the good side of life than to see the bad. - Jimmy Buffett

I had only a little time left and I didn't want to waste it on God. - Albert Camus

How does a project get to be a year behind schedule? One day at a time. - Fred Brooks

A teacher affects eternity. He can never tell where his influence stops. - Henry Adams

Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties. - Jules Renard

An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come. - Victor Hugo

Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn. - Harriet Beecher Stowe

Never attempt to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and annoys the pig. - Robert A. Heinlein

Spending time being can be just as, if not more, fulfilling as spending time doing. - Faydra D. Fields

Character is the result of two things: Mental attitude and the way we spend our time. - Elbert Green Hubbard

By the time they're ready to be thrown away, most shoes are thoroughly comfortable. - Andy Rooney

Middle Age is the awkward period when Father Time starts catching up with Mother Nature. - Harold Coffin

Writing is mentally stimulating; it's like a puzzle that makes you think all the time. - Stephanie Zimbalist

He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is. - Lou Duva

The months and days are the travelers of eternity. The years that come and go are also voyagers. - Matsuo Basho

The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs... one step at a time. - Joe Girard

Success does not consist in never making blunders, but in never making the same one a second time. - Josh Billings

In the long run, the pessimist may be proved right, but the optimist has a better time on the trip. - Unknown

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it. - George Burns

I grew up in an Irish Catholic family, and I think they force you to watch every James Cagney movie. - Jimmy Fallon

Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week. - Maggie Kuhn

I played basketball in high school, and I love watching sports - I'll watch everything except maybe hockey. - Andy Roddick

I think and think for months and years. Ninety-nine times, the conclusion is false. The hundredth time I am right. - Albert Einstein

Maybe I couldn’t be dafter,
But I keep wondering if this time we settle our differences before a war instead of after. - Ogden Nash

Cricket - a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity. - Lord Mancroft

Time is of of no account with great thoughts, which are as fresh today as when they first passed through their authors' minds ages ago. - Samuel Smiles

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller


Aussie Ford Coupe

Latte Defined

Anti-Bird Protection

Helping Hands In The Stands

Mouth Candy

Nose Hair? She needs a Barb-hair

Window Washers at a Children's Hospital

Spaghetti Digest

Ready Soon

iPhone Charger

Tube Travel

Redneck Tree Fort

OCD Guy

World's Tallest Bus

Long Liquor Store

Happy Wood Pig

On Top Of Things

Anail Retention

Bat Flight

The No Brainer

Truck Bender

Bacon Balls

Fast Closure

Ukrainian Feast