#1 humor site on the 'net

Eat Your Dinner!

Little Johnny thought he had it tough eating vegetables

Eat Your Dinner! thanks to Gwen Laxton

QuotaBills
Dinner is poured. - WC Fields

A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

If you wish to grow thinner, diminish your dinner. - H.S. Leigh

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach. - WC Fields

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

My favorite thing to make for dinner is reservations. - Unknown

He that waits upon fortune is never sure of a dinner. - Benjamin Franklin

Out for lunch. If not back by five, out for dinner also. - Unknown

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. - Fran Lebowitz

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one's own relations. - Oscar Wilde

When rats infest the palace, a lame cat is better than the swiftest horse. - Chinese Proverb

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton

Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. - James Bovard

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

The truly free man is the one who will turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse. - Jules Renard

I had a feeling once about mathematics – that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go. - Winston Churchill

When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face.
That's the price she has to pay. - Groucho Marx

If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner. - H L Mencken

Because of their cuisine, Germans don't consider farting rude. They'd certainly be out of luck if they did. - P.J. O'Rourke

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Lord Alfred Tennyson

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner. - WC Fields

I'm Irish, so I'm used to odd stews. I can take it. Just throw a lot of carrots and onions in there and I'll call it dinner. - Liam Neeson

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain


Crosswalk Climber

African Flip Flops

Lion In The Bathtub

Tiring Tire

Foot Wear

Zebra Keyboard

Until We Understand Women

Grizzly Shoot

Historic Texting

4x4 Kitchen Design

World's Largest Sudoku Puzzle

Water Hypnosis

Flu Fashion

Handicap Porch

Underwater Home

Subway Solutions

Grass Room

Row Your Goat

Moment Just Before Being Soaked... @ T - 1

Bridge Claimed Another One

Woman-Riding Man

Thin Polar Bear

Hand Tool

Rainbow Beer