#1 humor site on the 'net

Learn To Cook

Culinary inspiration from alphabet soup

Learn To Cook thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Spelling your way to gourmet dishes

QuotaBills
The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb

There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw

Bacon bits are like fairy dust of the food community. - Unknown

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

I'm a terrible cook, but I make very good lobster salad. - Nancy Carell

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen

Fang drops so much food on his ties we keep them in the refrigerator. - Phyllis Diller

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

The maxim that the "best is the cheapest" does not apply to food. - W.O. Atwater

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. - Unknown

If you meet someone who can cook and do housework, don't hesitate a minute - marry him! - Rita Rudner

From an early age I understood that cooking was never going to be a job, it's a passion. - Gordon Ramsay

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside. - Mark Twain

Once you have mastered a technique, you hardly need look at a recipe again, and can take off on your own. - Julia Child

Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation. - Homer Simpson

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

Because of their cuisine, Germans don't consider farting rude. They'd certainly be out of luck if they did. - P.J. O'Rourke

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

I love spaghetti. And I like to cook spaghetti. And I used to eat it every day. I weighed thirty pounds more than I do now. - Christopher Walken

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock


Puppy Taco

On The Edge

Laptop Cooler

Bruce Lee Coffee

Stealth Cat

Fish Hawg

Bee Beard

Titanic Trailer

Porsche Bird Droppings

Foosball Maze

Brain Logic

Kickback - England

Preschool Parking

Look Daddy - Baby Kittens!

Big Ambitions

Mannequin Cello

Overloaded Bookshop

Bear Warning

Sinking Feeling

XL Safety Shoes

Colorectal Exam For Dogs

How To Stop Snoring

Bridge Uplift

Shark Steaks