#1 humor site on the 'net

Recipe Holder

Finding a recipe for success

Recipe Holder thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Helping out the eyesite and memory in the kitchen

QuotaBills
Then you add two forkfuls of cooking oil. - The French Chef

The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

She did not so much cook as assassinate food. - Storm Jameson

I am putting real plums into an imaginary cake. - Mary McCarthy

Where love sets the table, food tastes at its best. - French Proverb

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is. - Ireland Proverb

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it. - Steven Wright

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much. - George Harrison

Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander

My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

A great empire, like a great cake, is most easily diminished at the edges. - Benjamin Franklin

Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece. - Ludwig Erhard

Once you have mastered a technique, you hardly need look at a recipe again, and can take off on your own. - Julia Child

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

No matter what the recipe, any baker can do wonders in the kitchen with some good ingredients and an upbeat attitude. - Buddy Valastro

I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

If you're trying to create a company, it's like baking a cake. You have to have all the ingredients in the right proportion. - Elon Musk

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock


World's Tallest Bus

Long Liquor Store

Happy Wood Pig

On Top Of Things

Anail Retention

Bat Flight

The No Brainer

Truck Bender

Bacon Balls

Fast Closure

Ukrainian Feast

1934 Modern Home

Fliptus

Copper Tubing Specialist

Bach Off Van

Boss Resume

Canadian Gun Shop

Hogwart's Other Bridge

Excalibutter

As The World Turns

Bird Condo

Legal Assistance For All

Chinese Law School

Do Not Stack