#1 humor site on the 'net

Static Cat

Foam packaging makes the trip so much safer

Static Cat thanks to Gwen Laxton

How to ship your cat

QuotaBills
You gotta be kitten me. - Unknown

Curiosity killed the cat. - English Proverb

A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. - Garrison Keillor

It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween. - Unknown

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Lord Alfred Tennyson

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

When I hear of an 'equity' in a case like this, I am reminded of a blind man in a dark room - looking for a black cat - which isn't there. - Charles Bowen


Happy ARRRRRRRHH!

Underground Parking

TV Conference

Chair Master

Killing Bugs

Alligator Ice

Dog Walker

Shanghai's Fullen Restaurant

Watts Wrong?

Beach Farmer

Facebook Wedding

Redneck Stealth Bomber

Lunch Anyone?

Coupon for Free Ride

How To Make A Deer Stand

Weather Forecast Toaster

Top-Heavy Truck with Afro Haircut

Hubcap Shine

Wooden Owl

One Way Repairs

Polar Breath

Nice Try, China

Enough Art Supplies

Earth Day Memories