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Texas Wal-Mart Shopper

It's easy shopping when no other shoppers are around

Texas Wal-Mart Shopper thanks to Barry McCartney

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Texas is as odd as it is vast. - Henry Rollins

A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau

I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. - Molly Ivins

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun. - R Buckminster Fuller

Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde

I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. - Tammy Faye Bakker

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq. - Fran Lebowitz

In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun. - Unknown

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.' - Kinky Friedman

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone. - Al Capone

The landscape of Texas is in all my work. It's that light; it's that sky. - Robert Wilson

Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. - Sam Houston

If you have a gun you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank you can rob everyone. - Unknown

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

When I take a gun in hand, the safest place for a pheasant is just opposite the muzzle. - Sydney Smith

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented. - Molly Ivins

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

Only think of two things - the gun and the tape. When you hear the one, just run like hell until you break the other. - Sam Mussabini

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

I come bearing an olive branch in one hand, and the freedom fighter's gun in the other. Do not let the olive branch fall from my hand. - Yasser Arafat

The sky in Texas is the most amazing sky in the whole country, I think, like you can see more sky in Texas than you can see anywhere else in the world. - dina Menzel

The pleasure of jogging and running is rather like that of wearing a fur coat in Texas in August: the true joy comes in being able to take the damn thing off. - Joseph Epstein


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