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Antidepressants thanks to Howard Chapman

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Birth patrol pills. - Archie Bunker

Anatomy is destiny. - Sigmund Freud

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

Pain will leave you, when you let go. - Jeremy Aldana

Pain is temporary; quitting is forever. - Lance Armstrong

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain. - WC Fields

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

Through pain I've learned to comfort suffering men. - Virgil

No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb

Sleep, riches, and health to be truly enjoyed must be interrupted. - Johann Paul Friedrich Richter

One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea. - Walter Bagehot

The great art of life is sensation; to feel that we exist, even in pain. - Lord Byron

Humor does not diminish the pain - it makes the space around it get bigger. - Allen Klein

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

One of the major goals of health insurance reform is to bring down the cost. - Valerie Jarrett

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

My greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live. - Kanye West

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

People don't trust private health insurance companies for all the right reasons. - Bernie Sanders

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. - Dave Barry

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck

Cheerfulness is the best promoter of health and is as friendly to the mind as to the body. - Joseph Addison

We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves. - Prince Philip

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons

Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

The pain you feel today is the strength you feel tomorrow. For every challenge encountered there is opportunity for growth. - Unknown

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright


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