#1 humor site on the 'net

Centennial Puff

Lighting the candles at your own 100th Birthday Party

Centennial Puff thanks to Mike King

Still going strong when you're past 100 years young

Unhealthy lifestyles with unlikely life expectation
Growing old ... Q: who wants to live past 100?
A: Someone who is 99

QuotaBills
Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Old age ain't for sissies. - Bette Davis

Photographing a cake can be art. - Irving Penn

I'm not much of a cake person. - Daniel Radcliffe

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics. - Fletcher Knebel

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves. - Phyllis Diller

A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake. - Alfred Hitchcock

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Never have I enjoyed youth so thoroughly as I have in my old age. - George Santayana

Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man. - Leon Trotsky

Writing is only the frosting on my cake. I'm whole without it. - Tabitha King

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

In youth we run into difficulties; in old age difficulties run into us. - Josh Billings

Young men soon give, and soon forget, affronts; old age is slow in both. - Joseph Addison

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope

I suppose real old age begins when one looks backward rather than forward. - May Sarton

A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake. - Mitch Hedberg

More people would live to a ripe old age if they weren't too busy providing for it. - Unknown

Learning is an ornament in prosperity, a refuge in adversity, and a provision in old age. - Aristotle

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

A bad review is like baking a cake with all the best ingredients and having someone sit on it. - Danielle Steel

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do. - Golda Meir

When grace is joined with wrinkles, it is adorable. There is an unspeakable dawn in happy old age. - Victor Hugo

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times. - Mark Twain

A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece. - Ludwig Erhard

To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent - that is to triumph over old age. - Thomas Bailey Aldrich

I'm learning in my old age that the only thing you can do to keep your sanity is to stay in the moment. - Willem Dafoe

While we drink, and call for garlands, for perfumes and for maidens, old age is creeping on us unperceived. - Juvenal

I'm grateful that I never was that senior athlete who realized she'd done nothing but train all her life. - Clara Hughes

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

Old age has a great sense of calm and freedom. When the passions have relaxed their hold you have escaped, not from one master, but from many. - Plato


1st Rolex

Dish Dryer

Young Mechanic

Angry Mathematician

McLobster

Cliff Walks

Reading Chair

Puzzle Ad

Feeding Time

Rural Free Delivery

Urban Camper

Fractured Foot or Hand?

Yolkswagon

March of the Penguins - Canadian Version

Shoelusion

Almost Done

Swim Vacation

Foot Circle

Sumo Fault

Psychic Fair

Bread Dress

Cherry Picker

PMS Center

The Ass Family