#1 humor site on the 'net

Chinese Cooking

Chinese food recipes for the microwave

Chinese Cooking thanks to Barry McCartney

Military food preparation in North Korea

QuotaBills
Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley

Man is not free unless government is limited. - Ronald Reagan

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. - Groucho Marx

I now close my military career and just fade away. - Douglas MacArthur

e looks about as happy as a penguin in a microwave. - Sid Waddell

Marketing strategy is a lot like military strategy. - Liddell Hart

Government is an endless pursuit of new ways to tax. - Unknown

Most bad government results from too much government. - Thomas Jefferson

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value. - Marechal Ferdinand Foch

I was 32 when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate. - Julia Child

A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves. - Bertrand de Jouvenel

World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will

I look like I'm Chinese or Thai or Japanese - very different. - Mary Kom

The Republic of China - back in the Olympic Games for the first time. - David Coleman

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. - Will Rogers

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. - Will Rogers

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. - George Bernard Shaw

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins

Everyone wants to eat at the government's table, but nobody wants to do the dishes. - Werner Finck

Many agree that the worst thing that could ever happen is if Russia and China get closer. - Donald Trump

Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime. - Alphonse Allais

From an early age I understood that cooking was never going to be a job, it's a passion. - Gordon Ramsay

Like a bull into a china closet. Like in that picture, "The Prince and The Porpoise." - Archie Bunker

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. - Thomas Jefferson

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

The great thing about Glasgow now is that if there is a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards. - Billy Connolly

Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless. - Milton Friedman

Taxpayer - someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination. - Ronald Reagan

I have certain rules I live by. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Nothing. Zero. - George Carlin

Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller

I am sometimes a fox and sometimes a lion. The whole secret of government lies in knowing when to be the one or the other. - Napoleon Bonaparte

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis" is composed of two characters. One represents danger, and the other represents opportunity. - John F Kennedy


The Original Smart Phone

Never Go Full Retard

Floor Legs

Bowen Arrow

Aussie Mailbox

Pike Mouth Nest

Horse-Back Riding

Same Mistake Twice

Vegan Dentist

Smirnoff Women

Burnout Indication

Filet Minion

Israeli Moving Company

2019 Hooters Owl & Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Crab Collection

Gas-Resistant Pram

A Balanced Diet

How To Build A Fence

It's Broken Now

Lost Luggage

Portable Samurai

Give Her Crabs For Christmas

Target Entry

Help For Dead Children