#1 humor site on the 'net

Hair Plants

Going Green is now an integral part of life

Hair Plants thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Growing up in a kid's world

QuotaBills
I like perfume and flowers. - Donatella Versace

A fox is a wolf who sends flowers. - Ruth Brown

A root is a flower that disdains fame. - Kahlil Gibran

Growth itself contains the germ of happiness. - Pearl S. Buck

He doesn't dye his hair, he bleaches his face. - Johnny Carson

Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower. - Albert Camus

The strongest principle of growth lies in human choice. - George Eliot

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg

Tennis: a sport in which even an unseeded player can flower. - Unknown

The fuchsia is the world's most carefully spelled flower. - Jimmy Barnes

Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell. - Edward Abbey

Plant the seed of meditation and reap the fruit of peace of mind. - Unknown

No one flower can every symbolize this nation. America is a bouquet. - William Safire

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? - Lily Tomlin

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

Always it's Spring,and everyone's in love and flowers pick themselves. - e e cummings

A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen

I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort. - Zach Galifianakis

The grass withers, the flower fades
But the word of our God stands forever. - Isaiah 40:8

The only amaranthine flower on earth is virtue; the only lasting treasure, truth. - William Cowper

On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse. - Milton Berle

I don't want a wig that looks like a wig; I want one that could pass for a weave. - Nicki Minaj

In the hopes of reaching the moon men fail to see the flowers that blossom at their feet. - Albert Schweitzer

If I had a flower for every time I thought of you... I could walk through my garden forever. - Alfred Lord Tennyson

I want flowers, I don't want to text. What does that make me? What kind of dinosaur am I? - Jennifer Garner

I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

Every thought is a seed. If you plant crab apples, don't count on harvesting Golden Delicious. - Bill Meyer

I would have brung you flowers too, but I read in a magazine that they suck up all the carbon monoxygen. - Archie Bunker

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? - Frank Colby

I think people need to be educated to the fact that marijuana is not a drug. Marijuana is a flower. God put it here. - Willie Nelson

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing

At the age of six I wanted to be a cook. At seven I wanted to be Napoleon. And my ambition has been growing steadily ever since. - Salvador Dali

If you think in terms of a year, plant a seed; if in terms of ten years, plant trees; if in terms of 100 years, teach the people. - Confucius

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Giving up at something that no longer serves a purpose, or protects you, or helps you, isn't giving up at all, it's growing up. - Unknown

You know, sometimes I feel well and vital in the world, and sometimes I just feel so distressed I want to pull my hair out by the roots. - Sharon Stone

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash


Just Because You Are Right

Scooter Races

Tired Backhoe

Liftup Lunch

Stereo Bike

Yoga in Palm Springs

Bartender Spill

Tetris Logger

Pigging Out in El Paso

Foot Care

Guitar Dog

Cutout Coin Silhouettes

Tree Tattoo

Alt-Ctrl-Del Pillows

Portable GPS

Australian Cyclist

Helicopter Cuts

Holland Bike Lane - For Pros Only

Twins' First Piano Lesson

Foosball for Girls

Youth Walk

Last Selfie

Broccoli Muffins

Get Along Shirt