#1 humor site on the 'net

Hydro Water Power

Electricians finally found where the dam was leaking

Hydro Water Power thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Concerned about rising electricity rates?

Find out where your power is going
QuotaBills
The water doesn't know how old you are. - Dara Torres

Bread and water can so easily be toast and tea. - Janet Clarkson

A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle. - Unknown

Droughts are because god didn't pay his water bill. - Steven Wright

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

You can't cross the sea merely by staring at the water. - Rabindranath Tagore

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water. - WC Fields

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him float. - Unknown

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire. - William Butler Yeats

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it. - Joan Rivers

We're all just ghosts on a wire seeking the prick of an electric thought. - Robert Fanney

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair. - Rodney Dangerfield

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

You get the best effort from others not by lighting a fire beneath them, but by building a fire within. - Bob Nelson

Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

After all, when a stone is dropped into a pond, the water continues quivering even after the stone has sunk to the bottom. - Arthur Golden

Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion. - Unknown

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

From a drop of water a logician could infer the possibility of an Atlantic or a Niagara without having seen or heard of one or the other. - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler

This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us. - Unknown


Redneck Stealth Bomber

Lunch Anyone?

Coupon for Free Ride

How To Make A Deer Stand

Weather Forecast Toaster

Top-Heavy Truck with Afro Haircut

Hubcap Shine

Wooden Owl

One Way Repairs

Polar Breath

Nice Try, China

Enough Art Supplies

Earth Day Memories

Italian Fire Exit

Scottish Lawnmower

Self Confidence

Wrong On So Many Levels

Reflection

Which Way Cupcakes

Woman Argument

Fat Monkey Sculpture

Buddha Is Watching You

Picnic Boat Launch

Carnations vs. Roses