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Kenwood Chef

This chef does everything but cook

Kenwood Chef thanks to Mike King

Men that don't last long in the kitchen or house

QuotaBills
Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

Who has a bad wife, his hell begins on earth. - Dutch Proverb

No man should plant more garden than his wife can hoe. - Old Saying

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox

The antiques my wife buys at auctions are keeping me baroque. - Peter De Vries

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

A husband's conjungal and a wife's convivial obligation - Archie Bunker

A man's mother is his misfortune, but his wife is his fault. - Walter Begehot

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

In my house I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen

I'm having trouble managing the mansion. What I need is a wife. - Ella Grasso

Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife. - Shelley Winters

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles

Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

When my wife asked me to start a garden the first thing I dug up was an excuse. - Henny Youngman

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha Guitry

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be in my bath, and she'd come in and sink my boats. - Woody Allen

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield

I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with 28 years ago. - Will Rogers

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

For twenty-four years I've been in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me. - Henny Youngman

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home. - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife simply quoted, 'For better or worse.' It was only then that I realized the phrase was not multiple-choice. - Michael Gurnow

One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear. - J.B. Morton

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw


One-Knight Stands

Stealth Cell Phone Tower

Holes of the World

Sunken Bed

Australian Wildfire Survivor

Rat Toys

Radish Camouflage

Apple Art

Cake Finders

Shot Glasses

Frog Spout Security

Chopper Bicycle

Canadian Suntan

Walkway To Heaven

Groucho Marx and Jimmy Savile

Despicable Shoes

Prayer Conditioning

Lazy People Make Excellent Engineers

Spaghetti Western

Under The Weather

Backpack Barney

My Sweet Potato

Who Needs a Guard Dog?

My Next Life