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Kenwood Chef

This chef does everything but cook

Kenwood Chef thanks to Mike King

Men that don't last long in the kitchen or house

QuotaBills
Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

A husband's conjungal and a wife's convivial obligation - Archie Bunker

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

If ever a chef were to cook a fly, he would keep the breast for himself. - Poland Proverb

I believe in love and marriage, but not necessarily with the same person. - John Travolta

Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him. - Oscar Wilde

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown

We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

Psychiatrist: a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free. - Unknown

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay. - Milton Berle

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. - Mark Twain

When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, "I was just whispering in her mouth". - Groucho Marx

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

For twenty-four years I've been in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me. - Henny Youngman

Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress: those who are outside want to get in, and those inside want to get out. - French Proverb

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

A man with a career can have no time to waste upon his wife and friends; he has to devote it wholly to his enemies. - John Hobbes

My wife simply quoted, 'For better or worse.' It was only then that I realized the phrase was not multiple-choice. - Michael Gurnow


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