#1 humor site on the 'net

Resume Bar

Credentials that will satisfy any organization's appetite

Resume Bar thanks to Keith Blake

Experienced marketing professionals - bar none

QuotaBills
Fine words do not produce food. - Nigeria Proverb

Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

It's okay to play with your food. - Emeril Lagasse

She did not so much cook as assassinate food. - Storm Jameson

There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

Bacon bits are like fairy dust of the food community. - Unknown

Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is. - Ireland Proverb

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

Cooking certain dishes, like roast pork, reminds me of my mother. - Maya Angelou

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

Fang drops so much food on his ties we keep them in the refrigerator. - Phyllis Diller

If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Advice is like cooking - you should try it first before you feed it to others. - Unknown

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. - Unknown

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed. - A.J. Liebling

I always thought that bagels and lox was my soul food, but it turns out it's sushi. - Sara Sheridan

If more of us cared about food and home above gold, this world would be a merrier place. - Bilbo Baggins

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Once you have mastered a technique, you hardly need look at a recipe again, and can take off on your own. - Julia Child

I'm not from a maple producing area and so my maple syrup credentials are very much of the eating side. - Nancy Greeme

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

A burrito is a delicious food item that breaks down all social barriers and leads to temporary spiritual enlightenment. - Lisi Harrison

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen." - Unknown

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell


Spaghetti Cooker

Elephant Sunset

Tumbleweed Hairstyle

Car Jump

Darth Fiddler

African Ambulance

Fluent Sarcasm

A Picture Of Me In The Shower

Young Body Painter

Toemongous

How Russians Play Chess

Sudoku Cats

Luke FloorWalker

Proud Pug Parents

Reach For Your Dreams

Bouncing Checks

Abbreviated Beetle

Glass Prescription

Log Out - Here It Comes!

Roo Paper

Pool Fashion

Look At It This Way

Starbucks Bethlehem

Redneck House Cleaning