#1 humor site on the 'net

Swiss Army Mega Tools

Expanding the usefulness of a simple pocket knife

Swiss Army Mega Tools thanks to Howard Chapman

Getting ready for the next Boy Scout camp: Knife and sword store business on cutting edge

QuotaBills
Salivation Army - Archie Bunker

A good soldier is a poor scout. - Cheyenne Proverb

Love is a kind of military service. - Ovid

I am not a politician, but a soldier. - Idi Amin

In war, there are no unwounded soldiers. - Jose Narosky

Men have become the tools of their tools. - Henry David Thoreau

A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. - Rabindranath Tagore

Don't dig your grave with a knife and fork. - English Proverb

Social media are tools. Real time is a mindset. - David M. Scott

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. - Groucho Marx

Marketing strategy is a lot like military strategy. - Liddell Hart

The man who has a full set of tools has no children. - Unknown

Reading is a basic tool in the living of a good life. - Joseph Addison

Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value. - Marechal Ferdinand Foch

The military don't start wars. Politicians start wars. - William Westmoreland

We come not to mourn our dead soldiers, but to praise them. - Francis A Walker

Where some states have an army, the Prussian army has a state. - Voltaire

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music. - Groucho Marx

A conquering army on the border will not be stopped by eloquence. - Otto von Bismarck

History is a tool used by politicians to justify their intentions. - Ted Koppei

Be harmonious with each other, enrich the soldiers, ignore all others. - Septimius Severus

The most powerful leadership tool you have is your own personal example. - Unknown

Troubles are often the tools by which God fashions us for better things. - Henry Ward Beecher

A piece of spaghetti or a military unit can only be led from the front end. - George S Patton

An army of sheep led by a lion would defeat an army of lions led by a sheep. - Arab Proverb

If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. - Abraham Maslow

The most important persuasion tool you have in your entire arsenal is integrity. - Zig Ziglar

A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. - Homer Simpson

Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime. - Alphonse Allais

One only needs two tools in life: WD-40 to make things go, and duck tape to make them stop. - G.M. Weilacher

It used to be that when all else failed, a guy went into the army; now he becomes a consultant. - Blackie Sherrod

Moses was the greatest legislator and the commander in chief of perhaps the first liberation army. - Elie Wiesel

I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep. I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion. - Alexander the Great

The first who was king was a fortunate soldier: Who serves his country well has no need of ancestors. - Voltaire

There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world, and that is an idea whose time has come. - Victor Hugo

I didn't know that painters and writers retired. They're like soldiers – they just fade away. - Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Our Age of Anxiety is, in great part, the result of trying to do today's jobs with yesterday's tools. - Marshall McLuhan

My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself. - Henny Youngman

It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive to overpower an entire army of negative thoughts. - Robert H. Schuller

Surgeons must be very careful
When they take the knife!
Underneath their fine incisions
Stirs the Culprit - Life! - Emily Dickinson


Protractor Cook

Street Genius

Rebar Walker

No Worries

Road To Success

Politician Training

Math in Africa

Customers Wanted

Sock Storage

Hung Out To Dry

Need More Horsepower?

Japanese Diving Platform

Water Taxi

Wrench Family

How To Burn Fat

Ghetto Boat

Car Surgeon

Just Blew It

His Dent

Cheat of the Year

Divorce Defined

Paint Ladder

Peopledarin

Frozen Pipes in the Garage