#1 humor site on the 'net

Bacon Thoughts

T-Shirt for good-food moments

Bacon Thoughts thanks to Howard Chapman

I Love Bacon!

QuotaBills
Pork is my friend. - Tom Douglas

Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

Pulled pork jokes never get old. - Joel Edgerton

Bacon, The source of all happiness. - Samuel V.D. Evans

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

Among mortals second thoughts are wisest. - Euripides

Speech was given to man to disguise his thoughts. - Charles de Talleyrand

Mmmm, pork chops and bacon... my two favorite animals. - Homer Simpson

Your life is a reflection of your thoughts. Think well. - Danielle Pierre

My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations. - John Green

Before eating, always take a little time to thank the food. - Arapaho Proverb

You are only master of food that you haven't yet eaten. - Tibet Proverb

Cogito ergo dim sum. (Therefore I think these are pork buns) - Robert Byrne

I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it. - Steven Wright

As long as she thinks of a man, nobody objects to a woman thinking. - Virginia Woolf

I'm carrying so much pork, I'm beginning to get trichinosis. - Phil Gramm

I always have a quotation for everything - it saves original thinking. - Dorothy L. Sayers

Our thoughts determine our destiny, and our destiny determines our legacy. - John C Maxwell

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying

Borrowed thoughts, like borrowed money, only show the poverty of the borrower. - Lady Marguerite Blessington

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

I am guilty of asking the Senate for pork and proud of the Senate for giving it to me. - Ted Stevens

Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success. - Dr. Joyce Brothers

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves. - WC Fields

I unfortunately still crave chicken McNuggets and bacon, which is the meat candy of the world. - Katy Perry

Reading is a means of thinking with another person's mind; it forces you to stretch your own. - Charles Scribner

You don't go walking into the proverbial lion's den lightly. You start with a good breakfast. - Jim Butcher

Humour is our way of defending ourselves from life's absurdities by thinking absurdly about them. - Lewis Mumford

I rejoice that there are owls. They represent the stark twilight and unsatisfied thoughts which all have. - Henry David Thoreau

I blend my green drink every morning. I also fix my son a full-on American breakfast with bacon and toast. - Liz Phair

If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking. - Haruki Murakami

Bank of America is to sweetheart loans and Democratic Party payoffs as Paula Deen is to sugar and bacon grease. - Michelle Malkin

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

It's really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people. - Axl Rose

My wife and I tried two or three times in the last 40 years to have breakfast together, but it was so disagreeable we had to stop. - Winston Churchill

The divinity that shapes our ends is in ourselves... all that a man achieves or fails to achieve is the direct result of his own thoughts. - James Allen


How Paper Beats Rock

Joburg Police

Behind Curtain Number One

One More Drop

Changing Priorities

Made His Bed

Dog Sled

Only In Canada - Nosey Moose

Camper Tank

Plane Pushers

Wise Electricity Use

Critter Control

Redneck Ice Fishing

Skeletons In The Closet

Captive Audience Twins

Brew Table

Nailed It Baby

Water Supply

Holding His Own Portraits

Hawaii Scuba Bus

Chicken Pie

Computer Challenged

Swiss Reaper

Original Play Station