#1 humor site on the 'net

Big Birthday Surprise

Party with us - you'll have a blast!

Big Birthday Surprise thanks to Frank Redekop

Edible birthday balloons for the practical Joe-ker

QuotaBills
The secret to humor is surprise. - Aristotle

I'm not much of a cake person. - Daniel Radcliffe

A party without cake is just a meeting. - Julia Child

Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise. - Alice Walker

There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glenn

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy. - Von Clausewitz

"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

It's great to be a blonde. With low expectations it's very easy to surprise people. - Pamela Anderson

A bad review is like baking a cake with all the best ingredients and having someone sit on it. - Danielle Steel

A laugh is a surprise. And all humor is physical. I was always athletic, so that came naturally to me. - Chevy Chase

That the Pearl Harbor attack should have succeeded in achieving surprise seems a blessing from heaven. - Hideki Tojo

What a surprise to find you could shift the contents of your head like rearranging furniture in a room. - Lisa Alther

No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader.
No surprise in the writer, no surprise in the reader. - Robert Frost

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier. I put them in the same room and let them fight it out. - Steven Wright

Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown

I'm into all that sappy stuff - a surprise picnic, nice dinner, or traveling. I'm kind of an old romantic. - Will Estes

My husband wanted one of those big-screen TVs for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already. - Wendy Liebman

I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield


Chain Mail

Lunch Break

Wash Day On The Farm

High Tide Heels

Frozen Fish Meal

Stork Exhaust

I 'Saw' An Accident

Protractor Cook

Street Genius

Rebar Walker

No Worries

Road To Success

Politician Training

Math in Africa

Customers Wanted

Sock Storage

Hung Out To Dry

Need More Horsepower?

Japanese Diving Platform

Water Taxi

Wrench Family

How To Burn Fat

Ghetto Boat

Car Surgeon